You sir, with the balls

Two rants in two days? You’d think I was crabby. But this is really short, and actually an expression of concern more than an admonishment.

You sir, on the train across from me this morning. I hope that by this time you’ve gotten yourself some ointment or salve as your testicles seem to have been giving you some sincere grief as we rode the red line to Chicago avenue.

Apparently they need adjusting, itching, twisting and grabbing, and were so bothersome that you couldn’t even zip up your fucking pants.

So I assume you’re in pain. I hope that the guy you were sitting next to didn’t get it, or any of the other employees at Accenture as your briefcase so boldly said.

Do me a favor tomorrow. PUT YOUR SACK AWAY. I don’t want to see you rubbin’ the brain while I’m on my way to work.



Ugh. What a thing to see on the train first thing in the morning.

Whew… what a relief. When I saw the thread title I thought this was a thread about me!

I’ll put up with traffic jams on the way to work if it means the only balls that get whipped out in my car are mine.

What, you didn’t find that fetching? :smiley:

Point taken. zip

Sorry, I’ll try to be more careful next time.

BTW, does Bongo Bob still hang around at the Madison Stop?

Flirting tip #728 - Rubbing your sack on the bus is BAD…


I once saw a man reach down inside his pants and scratch his ass-in CHURCH!!! GAAAHHH. I mean, come ON!

I’m glad he was two pews ahead of me-can you imagine the poor people around him during the Sign of Peace-during Catholic Mass, we give the Sign of Peace-we shake hands and say, “Peace be with you,” to the people around us.

(Although, I remember being thrilled when I was near a handsome stranger…;))

Nice to see that Accenture can be a pain in their own balls for a change…

Jar, next time ask him if any of his numbers won.

Guin, I’ll have a hard time not snickering when I next hear “piece be with you” in church. At least he wasn’t working the communion plate.


Well now, lets not make any hasty blanket statements. Sometimes, with the right crowd, the right bus route …

[Barry White]

a little pocket pool may just lead to Looooooovvvvvvve…

[/Barry White]
And if it turns out that women really don’t like this at all, I am all out of opening lines. Sure, “Does this look infected?” isn’t a grand slam, but it has worked for me before.

That’s completely grotesque. You must be the luckiest man on earth if that’s worked for you, or were you trying to pick up an on-duty nurse at General?

Nah, you just gotta lighten up with your standards a bit.

Oh, sure, if you care about things like your women having teeth and them having IQs higher than 85 and them not being homeless crackwhores…

Then you just go ahead with your “standards”. I’ll chose the lovin’ every time.
Awwwww yeah. :cool:

Princess Bandersnatch was just laid off by Accenture, so they’re all a bunch of nut-sacks in my opinion.

Fuck yes. There’s nothing quite as disgusting as the sight of a management consultant before one has had ones morning coffee.


maybe he was just trying to show you the proper hand techniques to complete a cross-stitch

I actually said “EWWWWWW!!” out loud as I read that. That is totally vomitrocious. His pants weren’t even zipped? Eeeeeewww. I bet he has crabs or something. Were they actually visible? Because if so, that’s against the law.

Those things are kinda nasty-looking anyway. I mean, I know you guys are really, really fond of them & think they’re great, but I’m not even that crazy about looking at my boyfriend’s sack, let alone that of some random Accenture employee while riding public transit. I have to throw up now. This gets my nomination for grossest thread EVER.

Now I know of yet another reason why I am not married.

I thought you ladies liked looking at cottage-cheese-trimmed nut sacks.