Damn, I just pulled the zipper on myself. I really need to start wearing underwear. Owwww… I hope little Amp can forgive me for this.
Reading the title of this thread was painful enough for me. Good luck with that.
I just stopped wearing pants.
Problem eliminated.
Thanks for reminding me of that unforgettable scene in “Something About Mary”! Makes me cringe to think about it.
Oh, owch.
Blood drawn?
scared to read answer
I accidentally did this to my ex-husband once. It wasn’t pretty. I tried to help him, but he finally just asked me to let him do it. I couldn’t watch - I had to leave the room.
Consequently, I was banished from it for about a week.
I felt terrible. (about the injury, not the banishment!)
No, no blood drawn, thankfully. The thing I hate about that happening is knowing that you need to backtrack to get the zipper off, which hurts just as much as getting caught in the first place.
Been there. Done that.
Ouch. Big Ouch.
I sometimes substitute at a preschool, and one of the jobs I sometimes get assigned is to make sure all the little boys use the toilet after lunch and before outside play time. (Other times I watch the little girls, but they don’t yet have anything that’s likely to get caught in a zipper, so that’s not important now.) I keep waiting, with dread, for this accident to occur. It’s not that they don’t wear underwear, it’s just that the underwear gets twisted, and the kids don’t always check that Mister Happy is secure, and I’m distracted by explaining to two other kids that you can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you MAY NOT pick your friend’s nose, and just like that, the zipper goes up before I can yell HEY, TUCK THAT IN, WILLYA?! Somehow, we have avoided disaster, but my heart is in my throat every time I see it.
So, Amp, would you like to come over here and explain to the little boys about the dangers of unsafe zipping? 
Didn’t think so. Get well soon, Little Amp.
[Walt Garrison]
Just a pinch between your cheeks and gun?
[/Walt Garrison]
Franks And Beans!
Been there, done that. Thankfully I was young and don’t really remember the incident, but my mom still loves to tell the story. Seems that, while telling her about it, I said “It was as red as Maw Maw’s lipstick!”.
Yep, unfortunately another victim here. How could the skin get all entwined in the mechanism? All zig zaggy. It looked as awful as it felt. Unzipped millimeter by millimeter. Youch!!
Hijack. By the way, do you say zip it up or zipper it up?
While not quite a stuck-in-the-zipper story, I walked to the store (1/3 mile) yesterday, “going greek.” Unfortunately, I hadn’t anticipated Nubby’s head being pretty well rubbed raw from the backside of the zipper. Made the 1/3 mile back kind of painful. I promptly put on briefs - and salve - when I got home.
Former NY-Stater, here, and we say “zip up.”
Like sitting down when the toilet seat is up, this is a mistake you shouldn’t have to make more than once in a life. It makes quite an impression.
Back in college I was accosted by an honest to og trench coated flasher. My first thought was that his little friend looked pretty dusty. We still write, so perhaps you can tell me, do you use Pledge or Murphy’s Oil Soap?
The question is?
Was it a vasectomy or a circumcision? :eek:
[Meat Nazi]
No Schtupp For You!
[/Meat Nazi]
My 3yr-old nephew really had to go and ran to the restroom. And I am not totally clear on how it came about but the seat did not stay up and came down upon wee willy in mid wee. Unfortunate youngling, I am given to understand that the appendegde was quite bruised and he was in pain for days.
Padded, or worse, carpeted toilet seats are every man’s enemy!
Nubby? I take it you’re a grower, rather than a shower. And, never heard it as “going greek” before. I’ll just add that to “commando” and “regimental”
All in all, this discussion makes kilts sound more and more appealing. Nothing under there but my boots.