Its too bad you confronted him. You could have collected it and left it in a bag on his seat.
I don’t think his rectum is prehensile: I suspect its got a wide angle lens.
You related to Martha? Maybe I should have put it in a nice burlap bag, imprinted with flowers.(couldn’t resist)
[snaps fingers in revelation]That’s it![/snaps fingers in revelation]he’s got a shower massage stuck up there in “wide angle spray” mode! I only need to change it to “narrow stream” and we’re O.K.! Where’s my pipe wrench…
B.
There was shit everywhere, the new paint was peeling
Why that Fuckwicket even got shit on the ceiling!
New sig for me!! I call it!(Can I use curses in my sig line?)
Zette
Hey Billy, what was the outcome of that confrontation? Has Fuckwicket cleaned up his act at all?
Ohhhhhhhhh…That post had me literally laughing so hard that I was crying - howling aloud, in fact. Good thing no one’s home 
Incidentally, “prehensile rectum” is an awesome phrase, right up there with my current favorite word, “defenestration”. Seeya later, I need to go take a shit.
No such luck. Big glob on the porcelean between the horns of the seat- (how do you get shit in front of you?) this afternoon.
I just don’t get it.
b.
I’m afraid your opening post and the Dr Seuss rhyme might have to do the rounds of my friends…
I have an alternative solution. Peer group pressure. Get 5 of your work mates to follow him in, and then stand around in the toilet basins laughing and joking. He’ll freeze up. It will cause him pain. The negative reinforcement conditioning will discourage him from using the work toilet.
maybe it’ll get back to the respective parties.
Otherwise, having said my say to the Fuckwicket, I’m going to let it drop on a personal level.
I have known this man for a while and find him to be a decent person, good engineer, and otherwise OK. So I won’t torture him, I’ll just try to be charitable and avoid using that crapper. Hell, you never know, maybe he will clean up his act eventually, it may just take time.
In the meantime I WILL be printing the Seuss posting and laminating it, perhaps placing it on the wall of that particular stall.
b.
A sick MO-FO with a three-way anus.
OR
Guys and Gals engaging in a conversation, on the internet, about shit (literally).
You people make me sick.
So, sick, that I had dierreaha. You people want a picture?
I suspect, not being able to use your spell check to get “diarrhea” right.
No, thanks, I think we got it.
b.
Geez, wolfseyn. You didn’t have to make such a big stink about it.
I’m so proud to be here!!!
b.
You could say that your thread really made a splash!
Inquiring minds worldwide wish to be kept abreast of developments in your office lavatory…
Clean potty all around. And I know he used it. Maybe it’s making a diffeence.
b.
I don’t know whether to be happy for you, or personally let down.
Oh, believe me, there will be further rantings of like nature in the not too distant future. My life is filled with reasons to rant, and since it is NOT my habit to rant IRL, I tend to rant here. Helps me get it out, prevents me from having to go to work with explosives.I’m eternally grateful to the SDMB for allowing me an outlet for my frustrations.
b.
I sent this rant to a friend of mine, knowing she’d appreciate it (she did). She also pointed out, however, that your office mate is displaying classic signs of bulimia, namely the laxative abuse and the fear of getting fat if food remains in his digestive tract too long. In other words, the man may well need medical and psychiatric help, and the sooner the better. You can kill yourself doing this.
Apparently other people too.
Thanks for the link Billy. This was priceless.
Warning! If you are disgusted easily, read no more!!! I’m serious!
I have nothing to add except that I actually met a person with a prehensile rectum once… WAY disgusting!!!
I used to work at a psychiatric hospital, in the maximum security forensics ward (crazy criminals!:eek: ). One night, we got notice that we would be getting a new patient with a “prolapsed rectum”…
“What the fuck?” we all wondered.
Maybe an hour later, the police arrived, with our new patient. We took custody, and lead him to the shower (standard procedure, shower them first at admittance…). In the shower room, we had him strip to wash up… and noticed that the last 8 or so inches of his rectum were, indeed, prolapsed! IE: turned inside out, and hanging out of his anus! EEEEEWWWWW!!!:eek:
We told him to take a shower, and he walked off to the stall, (I kid you not!) dripping feces from his prolapsed bowels (waving back and forth) with every step. Fortunately I won the “who’s going to clean up” contest we quickly held…
Interesting fact: the color of the insides of your lower bowels is a BRIGHT scarlet-red!
As he showered, we discussed what we were going to do with THIS guy… and eventually concluded that we were going to send him to the hospital for a med-eval. None of us had any idea what health risks were involved with having your ass turned inside out!
He finished showering, we got him dressed, and sent him off to the hospital.
Once he got to the hospital, a doctor examined him and found that his anus and rectum were normal… no prolapse at all!
Conclusion: he could do it at will! When he wanted to, he could relax his anal sphincter and let his bowels prolapse!(proven by later observation.)
Once we got him on meds, and stabilized, he didn’t do that anymore… but MAN, that’s the most disgusting thing I have ever seen!
Prehensile rectum, indeed!