I’m very sorry about my guilt complex.
I think you should ALL apologize for all of these damned apologies. They’re irritating the hell out of me.
If you don’t, you’ll all be sorry!
God is love. Love is blind. Ray Charles is blind. Therefore, Ray Charles is God.
I’d like to apologize for Coosa, my evil-twin-separated-before-birth sock puppet. She didn’t know what she was saying, because I didn’t know what I was saying. Sorry.
Please don’t kick the stuffing out of her. My hand is still sore from the catfights at the ATMB and the Pit.
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
::: anxious to be obliging :::
Um, okay, um–where? Does this have something to do with kinky sex e-mails? I notice you didn’t send ME one; I suppose you heard that I was happily married…Oh, well, it’s your loss… 
One question: if I bite you, do I have to apologize for it afterwards?
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
Ah, okay, this is kind of embarrassing.
My better half, reading over my shoulder just now, and being more sensitive to nuances than I am, has just pointed out that I should probably really apologize for using Pashley’s quote out of context in an unedifying manner. (The word actually used was “tacky”.)
I would therefore like to genuinely apologize to Pashley for using his quote out of context in a tacky and unedifying manner. I was trying to be amusing and ended up being hurtful. Sorry. :o
Hey, a real apology in the “Apologies” thread. How about that…
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
<<< *okay, there, I apologized, now would you please take the kitten out of the microwave…? *>>>
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
I have NOW been informed that my previous post acts to negate any possible apologetic value my apology post may have had, and so I have to do it all over again.
Okay, Pashley, I’m sorry, really I am. I bitterly regret ever trying to use your quote to be funny.
Okay?
(going out to mow the lawn…the lawn mower doesn’t expect any apologies, and it always laughs at ALL my jokes…)
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
I’d like to apologize to Polycarp on the outside chance he see my sig in this thread, and his head explodes.
I’d like to apologize to anyone who ever cut me off in traffic, and had to listen to my shril car horn. I’m such a bastard.
I’d like to apologize to all the posters on this board for my sarcastic, wiseass replies. I don’t deserve to be here. I cast a shadow in your presence.
I’d also like to apologize for once again having gratuitious cursing in my post.
Fuck.
Ass.
Shit.
Cock-sucking cooze monkey.
You say “cheesy” like that’s a BAD thing.
I apologize to you for your being happily married notthemama and I didn’t send you an email because you did not ask for one and I’m sure that your computer would suffer a major meltdown if I did, you better pass on this one.
** Sigh. So many men, so few who can afford me ** Original by Wally
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
Homepage: www.superlativeandsassy.com
Occupation: Temptress
Location: Ultra, California
Interests: surpluses, excesses, abundances, extras, lagniappes
profile by UncleBeer
Jezebel–How dare you intercept my well-deserved, albeit delayed, apology from Milo just to nit-pick his use of the word “pray”!?!?! I demand an even swifter apology from you!
And Notthemama, did you obtain express, written permission from the headquarters of Evil Inc. to attribute the enviable quality of “evil” to coosa? I, for one, don’t remember being asked. I am deeply offended that you would dare consider yourself worthy enough to go around bestowing titles like “evil” on people without approval. I’m not even sure an apology will suffice…
Those who are dancing look insane to those who cannot hear the music.
One-of-a-kind, custom-designed Wally sig available on request.
And just what music is playing on this thread?
** Please don’t kick the stuffing out of her. My hand is still sore from the catfights at the ATMB and the Pit. **
I’d like to apologize for not being a better sock puppet for Notthemama, I’m made of inferior grade cotton, and I feel horrible about it. I could have done a better job in the catfight too, but I’m also kinda scared of cats, sorry! ::sniff::: snifffff::::::
::::::::::limping, and shuffling away:::::::
‘Mr. Shields had challenged Mr. Lincoln to a duel, and that, as the challenged party, it was Mr. Lincoln’s right to choose the weapons.
Mr. Lincoln responded, “How about cow-dung at five paces?”’
Alright, Notthemama, look what you’ve done now! You’ve made Anti Pro cry! You’d better apologize right now!
BTW, Anti, I think we’re going to be out of a job - I heard a rumor that Not has stuffed a brick into one of her socks . . .
God is love. Love is blind. Ray Charles is blind. Therefore, Ray Charles is God.
My mistake. I am so sorry for using my sig line to comment on those unfortunate souls who cannot hear the music. My deepest apologies go out to you.
Those who are dancing look insane to those who cannot hear the music.
One-of-a-kind, custom-designed Wally sig available on request.
I apologize for being utterly unremorseful and unrepentant.
“Don’t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.”
- Pancho Villa
HA! I don’t HAVE to apologize for calling Coosa evil, because she called HERSELF evil FIRST! See this thread
http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum5/HTML/000941.html
Ha! The nattering nabobs of negativism have been defeated, nyah, nyah, nyah.
::: dancing ::: not sorry, not sorry, not sorry – what?
“–”
whaddaya mean, gloating is ugly?
“–”
I will not apologize for gloating.
“–”
Will not.
“–”
Will not.
“–”
Wild horses couldn’t make me apologize.
“-- – --”
<<< extreme sarcasm >>> … sor-ryy… :rolleyes:
Fuck.
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
I’d like to apologize to all my sock puppets, past, present, and future, for making some of them out of inferior grade Wal-Mart sweat socks, and for not gluing the eyes on tight enough on some of them.
I would also like to apologize to Mr. Brick, for taking him away from his family and forcing him to perform menial labor on SDMB’s Egregious Crap Patrol.
Finally, I would like to offer my sincerest apologies to MTKup. I’m sorry that the Straight Dope Message Board’s gravitational field has sucked you into its orbit. Resign yourself to the fact that your old life is gone, MTKup. Welcome to the Ho-tel California. You can never leave.
BWAH-HAH-HAH-HAH HA HA HA HA!!!
“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen
** BTW, Anti, I think we’re going to be out of a job - I heard a rumor that Not has stuffed a brick into one of her socks . . . **
Ha!! ** coosa, ** Notthemama can’t put the brick into ME!! I was the HOLEY sock, this said brick will either fall on the ground making it hit our sock puppeteer, Notthemama’s toe causing untold damage to her clown shoes, OR YOU with your eeeevil ways will melt that brick with ** one of your steely eyed stares! **
- Either way, I’m covered, well, except for the hole, that is! *
hehehehe uh, I’m sorry for…not having some crazy glue to help glue back on coosa’s sock puppet eyes, which fell into Notthemama’s soup, sorry, didja save the eye?
I for one am offended by the tone of your apology.
“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said, in a rather scornful tone, “it means
just what I choose it to mean – neither more nor less.” -Lewis Carroll
I’m sorry, that you’re offended, dpr. I’m crummy at apologizing, I’m still working on it, I’m getting a lot of practice here though!