“Pure Evil?! Been there, done that seven long years. Let’s try something New.”
Dems:
We may not enthrall you, but we won’t embarrass you.
Pubs:
We can’t tell you why you should vote for us, it’s classified. But you should. And you will.
Dems:
All we have to do to improve over the Republicans is NOT do stuff that’s obviously stupid and evil. We can manage that.
Pubs:
Vote for us if and express your hatred of all Americans who are different in any way, especially gay Americans.
Yeah, like, if we had elected Al Gore president in 2000, we would STILL be in Iraq! Totally! :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
Yes, 1992-2000 was exactly like 2001-present. No difference whatsoever.
Sorry, featherlou, that hip disaffected “oh they’re all the same” bullshit just won’t fly anymore. We’ve looked into the abyss of a Republican government. People know what it looks like, and know that it is a very different and very scary thing.
Voting for the one you’d like to drink a beer with? How’s that workin’ for you?
GOP Voters: Would you say your biggest mistake was trading Sammy Sosa?
Democrats: Basing our decisions in reality since 1792.
Republicans: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice…uh… won’t get fooled again.
Vote Democrat and put science back in the schools.
Give the Republicans a real accountability moment.
Dammit, I forgot one:
A successful Republican government is just around the corner!
or, alternatively:
Vote Republican! We’ll be a success, just give us six more months and you’ll see.
I like this one! Here are my suggestions:
– Vote Democrat. Because Patriots Act.
– Democrats: Because the ideas of creating fear in the populace, fortifying borders in the name of “freedom,” spying on citizens who may be affiliated with the wrong group, detention without trial by presuming guilt not innocence, and questioning one’s patriotism based on one’s support of the administration should have died with the USSR.
On the sillier side…
– Democrats. Now with 100% fewer hunting accidents.
Oooh, may I shamelessly riff on this one?
Vote Democratic! We promise not to shoot old men in the face with shotguns.
Vote Democratic while you still can.
Democrats! 100% Bush-free !
I can get behind this.
I was going to post a weasel image I dug up awhile back when I was debating Bricker, but the party should commission a new cuddlier one with Gravitas.
Nice!
Pubs: “We don’t care how you vote; we’ll Still win! Thanks, Diebolt!!!”
After “Republicans for Voldemort,” how about:
Democrats for Molly Weasley?
“Vote Middle-Aged White Guy with No Personality—vote Democrat!”
“Go Dem: We won’t actually accomplish anything, but we won’t actually be trying to make our agenda NOT happen!”
“Vote for peace in our time—vote Copperhead!”
“Well…“Pinko” is close to “Red Stater,” right?”
“Democrats for National Unity—Unlike that party full of those drunken ignorant racist redneck god-jockey heehaws who should be ashamed to exist. Jeez, the boonies must be full of those animals. Please vote for us.”
“Because We Never Learn: We’re Nominating Either a Despised Female, or an Inexperienced Black Man!”
Or the Guy that Won the Most Popular Votes in 2000. (yes, I’m a dreamer)
“Same great corruption, but less bombing”
My favorite one.
(Images of Bush, Cheney, Rummy, Wolfie, etc.)
Tree, or Lamppost? A Time to Decide!