Checkout items that don't go well together

Well, I just did something like that…from a nearby 7-11, I got a bag of potato chips, one microwaved curry chicken baked rice, one bottle of soda and a bag full of instant cup noodles…

plus a copy of Men Health magazine. Ironically with the headline “Strong and Lean Results in 3 weeks!”

I’m sure Dopers everywhere has seem more absurd cases.

Funny. There was a thread a while back about someone checking out of Wal-Mart with something like razor blades, duct tape, wall bolts, and children’s toys.

“Let me have one of those porno magazines, large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a couple of those panty shields, and some illegal fireworks, and one of those disposable enemas… eh, make it two.”

Imodium and laundry detergent.

I used to pick up this combo on my way to work a lot; Lean Cuisine, Diet Coke and a candy bar.

Lotion and man sized tissues.

Also my friend used to work in a papershop when she was in college. There was a guy we named ‘twirl man’, he used to buy a porn mag and a twirl every week. One week he added in a measuring tape!

There’s a commercial on the radio these days where a guy picks up some tampons for his SO at the drug store, the cashier says “sounds like you’re a keeper”, then next on the shopping list is “condoms - HURRY!”, and the cashier remarks “sounds like she’s a keeper!”. Of course, there’s surely some explanation that doesn’t fit into a 30 second ad, but it’s still kind of a head-scratcher.

My guess is she’s a keeper for having sex during her period, as a lot of women won’t.

Homer?

I’ve always wanted to go to Walmart and get a hacksaw, duct tape, rope, garbage bags, and quicklime. Somehow I don’t think your average Walmart checker would bat an eye, though.

Condoms and the votive candles with saints on them that are often sold in supermarkets.

A shovel and a dog bone.

I hate buying condoms so I buy a bunch at a time. I also have a huge sweet tooth, so I couldn’t let the cheap bags of candy go. That must have looked weird as those were the only two things I bought.

40# bag of kitty litter, 14 cans of Fancy Feast, a big bag of Fancy Feast dry cat food…and a package of mouse traps.

Yes, the cashier did notice.

What the heck is a twirl?

Cucumbers, large carrots…and KY-jelly.

Fava beans and chianti.

It’s a chocolate bar.

Mineral oil, electrical tape, a Gerber pocket tool, pantyhose, some rope and (I think) a kitchen timer.

Yeah sometimes things don’t make sense at first.

Here’s my example. I eat 1,800 calories a day. And this works for me and keeps me in shape.

However there are times when I just want to splurge. So here’s how I do it.

Let’s say I want a Whopper w/Cheese and large fries from Burger King.

Whopper with Cheese has 760 and the fries have 540 calories. That’s a total of 1,300 calories.

Now I order Whopper with cheese, King fries and a diet Coke. I’m sure people would think, why not just get a regular Coke. And I can see how they arrive at that conclusion. But the Coke would add another 500 calories for a total of 1,800 calories

1,800 calories is my daily limit. So by ordeing the diet Coke, I can indulge and still have 500 calories left over for the day.

Another funny situation is, I volunteer at a retirement home and Walgreen had sales on candy. Now some of these residents have food stamps, so they asked me to buy them candy. So here I was in Walgreens the other day and I had a bunch of candy and such and I had them ring the orders up seperately and I was using cash, for some, different food stamps for others (the people gave me their cards) and even a credit card.

The clerk sure looked at me strangely.

Baby bottles, baby oil, cigars, and Depends.