Design the most hated Doper - with two rules.

[Amasia]

Blah- one more; I cannot resist.

The poster who feigns ignorance about something that a large number of people enjoy, discussing it in the most stupid way possible.

Example 1: “Can someone explain to me the appeal of watching steroid infused high school dropouts molest one another’s hindquarters while assembling in various formations to throw an oblong sphere and toward a giant metal wishbone? I mean, I just don’t get it.”

Example 2: “Can someone explain to me the appeal of paying hard earned money to send your pixels to the same location as someone else’s pixels, displacing their pixels, all while being cheered on by a bunch of 12 year old boys who can’t spell? I mean, I guess you must not have books or friends in your Mom’s basement.”

[Lord_Feldon]

@pulykamell

No paragraph breaks.

But lots of
line breaks.

[Autolycus]

Post many line breaks
So that your post is like an
awful haiku

[Der_Trihs]

@Autolycus

Post many line breaks
So that your post is like an
awful haiku

And do
it in large
font
and bright
colors.

[Smeghead]

Something something fat SUV driver.

[Darth_Panda]

I’m goign to go with:

1. doesn’t believe in global warming
2. posts blind links to cats being butchered for meat in Asia
3. hates fat people
4. won’t make you pancakes after rape
5. posts links to long studies as cites for ridiculous claims without realizing that they actually contradict his or her point
6. views texting as electronic rape

[Boyo_Jim]

Better than viewing rape as electronic texting.

[drewtwo99]

• Encourage other dopers to engage in something known as a “paper towel tube test” to prove anal penetration of an adolescent boy is impossible by an older man.

• Repeatedly assert that liberals are the real racists who are always trying to play the race card to get people on their side.

• Post about how gay marriage will help lead to the downfall of civilization and never explains why

• Engage repeatedly in strawman and no true scotsman logical fallacies (or any logical fallacies really)

[JKellyMap]

Creates a thread title with no meaningful content whatsoever. Like “Check this out!”, or “You’re not going to believe this!”.

And then there’s that recent thread “Question about…(something something)…?”

Huh? What’s with the question mark at the end? Are you asking us if we have a question about your pet subject?

I wanted to give a one-word reply “No.”, but then I’d be the snarky jerk.

(Sorry if my giving a semi-specific example breaks the rules of this thread. I don’t “hate” anyone, I think.)

[Cat_Whisperer]

@Alice_The_Goon

But that was the style at the time!<snip>

I’ll onion you good!

@digs

*“Calendar on my next phone: remind me on May 1st 2013 to pit Cat Whisperer for her onions catchphrase”. *

By then my kids’ll be saying ‘When I said onionless, I meant zero onionage, mon!’

You too!

The most hated Doper also puts in an asterisk for further explanation*, then doesn’t provide the explanation.

[Buck_Godot]

Helpfully complete both sides of the argument by making definite statements about how their opponents will respond. Particularly if either

1. The thread is made up of their opponents saying just the opposite,
   “Of course no one on the dope will say anything against Senator X’s bribery” when a dozen posters have already said they condemn his actions.

or

2. if it is a hypothetical scenario reverse scenario.
   “Well, if it was a Democratic Senator who had gone on a seven day killing spree then the usual suspects would be here to defend his actions.”

[Silver_Tyger]

@Der_Trihs

And do
it in large
font
and bright
colors.

And lots and lots of smilies. :smack:

[living_in_hell]

@Amasia

Blah- one more; I cannot resist.

The poster who feigns ignorance about something that a large number of people enjoy, discussing it in the most stupid way possible.

Example 1: “Can someone explain to me the appeal of watching steroid infused high school dropouts molest one another’s hindquarters while assembling in various formations to throw an oblong sphere and toward a giant metal wishbone? I mean, I just don’t get it.”

Example 2: “Can someone explain to me the appeal of paying hard earned money to send your pixels to the same location as someone else’s pixels, displacing their pixels, all while being cheered on by a bunch of 12 year old boys who can’t spell? I mean, I guess you must not have books or friends in your Mom’s basement.”

Hey–I really didn’t know anything about furries, and I figured that this forum was the safest place to gather intel.

[elucidator]

Smilies! Slowly, I turned…

[Drunky_Smurf]

@drewtwo99

• Post about how gay marriage will help lead to the downfall of civilization and never explains why.

This is almost true. Gay marriage WILL lead to the downfall of civilation. (Not just help it.)

[mkecane]

They bump the Paterno thread.

[Babale]

Let us assemble atop the mineshaft so that we may collectively disposed of our refuse within.

[Lust4Life]

@Boyo_Jim

They create some kind of bizarre catchphrase that makes no real sense and that everyone else hates, and they use it repeatedly.

But Jim. Its easier to be King for the day then to look at a rainbow through sunglasses on a winters morning.

[Sparky812]

1.) They actively hate The Beatles and no matter what arguments are presented to them and they will never accept that The Beatles were great songwriters and a massively influential band in music history.

2.) They post polls asking dopers to rate albums by their favorite mediocre alt. rock band from the 90s.

[Oliveritaly]

@AClockworkMelon

2.) Every single post of theirs is a joke.

I think Vinyl Turnip* IS VERY FUNNY DAMNIT! If you bastards scare him off!!!

Vinyl*, you crack me up everytime with your sense of humor (you and Mean Old Lady) …