I live under no bridges, but…
So what is it? I think eating dinner with someone I love is terrific but I ain’t gonna starve myself between relationships. I used to go hiking in the Sierra with my last girlfriend and it was magical. We’re no longer together. Don’t I get to go hiking anymore? Or do I have to have a relationship running before I go hiking?
I’m playing Devil’s advocate, here, of course. But sex, like everything else human, falls across a vast spectrum. I think sex in the context of a stable, loving relationship beats anything. That’s on the good nights (or days), of course. On the bad days it’s merely wonderful.
But if I’m not in a relationship then what’s wrong with sporting a bit. There are three women I know whom I occasionally sleep with. That means once or twice a year. It’s no big deal.
What is a bigger deal is my friendship and love for these women. If I thought screwing them would affect our friendships I’d never do it.
What else is bugging you?
Again it’s the Devil’s Advocate in me. If I thought a friend had a crush on me that I wasn’t willing to return, then no doubt, I’d never go to bed with her. Them’s the rules. You can’t fuck with people when you’re fucking them.
But friendly sex… Come’on!