So, Briminator, you like cookies and milk. What, you want your pacifier next? Maybe your blankey, so you can take a nappy?!? You know, some of us don’t have time for cookies and milk. Some of us are out here, in the big, bad grown-up world, trying to make a living so we can afford cookies and milk. But no, you just stroll in here, as casual as can be, proclaiming your love of cookies and milk. Well, here’s your cookies and milk, and your pacifier, and your blanky. Go take a nap and leave the rest of us grown-ups alone!
Well no fucking wonder. Oooooh, I gave blood today, aren’t I a fucking martyr, eh. Quick, somebody call the Nobel commitee. Maybe you’re pale 'cause there isn’t enough sunlight in that godforsaken tundra that you insist on calling a country to warm a tick’s ass. Please, tell us more about your menstrual cycle.
I used to love “Indian Pudding” scented candles from the Yankee Candle Factory.
Indian pudding? What the fuck are you smoking? You’re so hopelessly idiotic, you’re probably using the goddamn rope version of hemp. Too dumb to even smoke the right fucking plant. “Look at me, I like goddamn Indian Pudding candles from the motherfucking Yankee Candle Factory.” Besides, a fucking Yankee candle maker thinks they can make goddamm Indian goods? I can’t believe your horse-humping ass would support such an obviously shit-eating racist company. Oh, wait, I’m talking about peecubed. When it comes to him, nothing is too stupid to be true.
Pea soup what the fuck is wrong with you? Are you a goddamm pinko vegitarian? Real people eat pea sooup with ham in it. Just plain old pea soup is about as yummy as eating someon’s bowl of hot snot. Or if you want I’ll piss in a bowl and give you some real pee soup.
what the hell is wrong with you?! Haven’t you even CONSIDERED what coke can do to you? My god, I know there’s a lot of money in that white powder, but geez, anything that costs a fortune for a gram is just wrong. Not to mention what it must be doing to your family life!
You would like Murphy’s Oil Soap. You’ve been brainwashed by those stupid & condecending commercials that has all those poor women slaving away in that oppressive church. Scrubbing & polishing so that it looks nice for that bloody priest come Sunday. Kissing up to get on the fast track to heaven. Like that’s gonna work. I’m sure the priest won’t even get in. I mean really, what exactly does he do? He stands up on a stage telling everyone else why they’re going to hell. Who is he to judge? I thought that was God’s job. And I’m sure God would want them to do more productive things with their time. A quick swipe with Pledge is just as good.
Oh…is that so? What are you looking at her butt for anyway? Are you some kind of perv, some sicko with a butt fetish? I bet you collect butt magazines, don’t you. The word " Butt" probably turns you on. You just love butts, and think of nothing deeper than the size of someone’s can, and you call yourself a fighter of ignorence! Women don’t like to be objectified, and judging them on their butts is doing just that. And, if you happen to be woman yourself, you should be pretty damn ashamed of yourself, playing into catty bitterness, even if your own butt isn’t so hot, it doesn’t give you the right to complain about someone else’s butt! Worry about your own butt and keep your damn eyes where they belong!!
I hope there’s another X-Files movie soon, with Scully and Mulder.
Because that would just make your little geekboy lifestyle go wild, wouldn’t it? You’d actually emerge from the basement of your parents’ house to take in such filmic entertainment? Is it because the “truth” really is “out there”? Or is it just because you spend every second of your waking life thinking about chaining them up in your closet, forcing them to do obscene sex acts to each other and yourself? Hey! I got an alien probe for you!
Cat. You have a cat. Do you know how many times I hear “Oh, cats are so much cooler than dogs. . .”
Ya know what? Who the fuck cares?!? I am sooo sick of people brooding about “how great my cat is” or “how cute the kittens are”. Everyone knows that cats don’t do diddly squat. When was the last time a cat ran and got me the frisbee? When did your cat jump and bark at some stranger around your house? And furry? Jeezus, just look at all the damn hair I have to clean up! Get that four footed furball out of my house, or I will take it to the shotgun range and put it on a “Cat”-a-pult!
Tripler
The man in the moon just winked at me.
Listen up you sexist jagoff. The moon is named after a WOMAN!!! You blithering idiot. Lunar…luna…the Goddess of the Moon. God you stupid jerk with your misogynistic ways. Go back to whatever trailer park you came from and learn a little about mythology.
in suitably politically correct tone How dare you turn this game into your own personal anti-Semitic soap-box. Keep your country-fried non-kosher pig entrails to yourself you neo-fascist breakfast-heathen…
…As if we gave a rat’s rectum whether you’re early or late for your cute little corporate meetings where you and your pathetic Dilbert-wannabe loser cubicle gophers suck the living juices and precious bodily fluids from the formerly robust American economy.
Once upon a time there was a cute little boy named Charlie. Charlie was special because he had a pet monkey butler that could talk. Of course, Charlie was the only one who could hear the pet monkey butler talk, but who the hell cares? It made the boy happy. Once, when Charlie was 7 he stopped a burglar from stealing Mr Crensaw’s tv, and everyone thought he was a hero. Even into his teens people would say, there goes Charlie, what a swell boy. So Charlie grew up, and took the monkey butler with him to college, and they studied biophysics. One day, though, someone went into Charlie’s room since he missed his lab…and Charlie was laying on the floor with his head beaten in with a baseball bat. When the monkey was on trial he defended his actions by saying " He wouldn’t shut up about his fucking 8 year old car! I had to do it!!" And he got off. Now he’s coming for you, and he still has the bat…
People who think the Austin Powers movies are funny should be exiled from the rest of humanity.
You would think that there’s something wrong with people like that, wouldn’t you? It’s sooo like you, just like this lame attempt to revive a thread that’s been sleeping since the summer. Mom is wrong, you are a moron. Moron! You hear me??
I worry about you some times