For all those that need to know, or possibly don’t, here’s the news you’ve all been waiting for.
Yes, Katie Holmes has finally spawned.
Brace yourselves, everyone.
She sure was quiet about it. I never heard a thing.
Insert apocalypse joke here.
Suri, eh?
Well, thats at least sort of normal. I was expecting something along the lines of Elroni or something.
I wonder how Tom seasoned the placenta.
Mmmm … there’s good eatin’s at the Cruise household tonight!
With Placenta Helper, for sure. Probably a dash of Celestial Seasonings, too.
I, for one, welcome our new incredibly attractive overlords.
Good luck to the baby. She’ll need it.
YOU’RE SO GLIB! How dare you pretend to know anything about cooking placenta!
jumps on couch in a fit of scientology rage
By the way, it’s recommended that, for placenta roast, the placenta should be no more than 3 days old.
God help me, I’m gonna launch lunch.
Brooke Shields also gave birth to a daughter today.
If that ain’t the sign of the apocalypse, I don’t know what is.
E.
Ironic that Brooke gives birth on the same day as TomKat Spawn?
I feel so sorry for little Suri.
Wow! 20 inchs long! Like a chip off the Old Holmes!
Oh, wait a minute…
Suri should do better than poor Preston. At least her parents’ IQs total more than 110.
Or whether he had it over polenta.
Placenta Cocktail:
1/4 cup raw placenta
8oz V-8 juice
2 ice cubes
1/2 cup carrot.
Blend at high speed for 10 seconds
But do you salt the rim?
Aww sweet little fuzzy baby! (Sorry, I’m an obsessive knitter. When I saw the name it was all I could think of. And alpacas are sweet really. Aside from the fighting teeth.)
How big is a placenta, like 5 to 10 lbs?
I’m not skittish about eating organs; I’ve cooked and eaten liver fresh from a deer I’ve just shot. I’ve seen fresh placenta, and it didn’t look like anything I would consider eating.
Suri. Its different; I like it. Too bad she didn’t get “creative”. If the last name will be Cruise, Sea would’ve been a good choice, with org being the middle name.
I kid. 