…but his paws couldn’t push the button and he ended up smacking it behind the fridge.
Jumping off the bridge proved…
… that water can be as hard as concrete.
Thankfully, I got through the water’s surface, and …
…and dragged to the depths madness bu an indescribable horror of the deep.
Madness consumed…
…did a little underwater sightseeing.
I didn’t see much because…
Madness consumed.
That reminds me, I am starving______.
…a drifter chained up in my basement so his skin gets nice and loose.
After skinning him…
… I’m going to kick back with a cold beer.
After all, performing such a task …
…can wear the victim’s fingers to the bones.
One thing I will never do with my fingers is…
… play “Cat’s Cradle.”
The string always gets tangled, and …
I get confused. Nope. No fun.
I want go bowling, but______.
Bowling is for squares and I am most certainly NOT a square, thankyouverymuch.
I was bowling back in '79 when i met_____.
Tony Orlando and Dawn.
Once I tied…
… a yellow ribbon around a *young *oak tree just to be different.
Tony Orlando starts his day …
by skinning a starving drifter, whenever he can get one.
I sure hope Mr. Orlando doesn’t sue me for defamation, because ______________
… I have better lawyers than he has.
I once knocked three times on the ceiling …
…and got plaster dust in my eyes and hair.
I immediately made an appointment…
… with a drywall contractor.
He provided an estimate that …
…I’m pretty sure would be considered a war crime.
I locked him in my basement…
…and played rock paper scissors until I won.
That was when I made him…
…a light lunch.
Afterwards, he fixed…