… less laundry to do the next time I do laundry.
Of course, when I do laundry …
I do it fully dressed to the nines.
I like to showing my______.
… formal wear.
It makes me feel like I’m at …
a wedding.
The best wedding toast I ever heard
… was the one where the speaker complimented the bridesmaids, thanked the groomsmen, and toasted the couple, and then shut up.
At the last wedding I attended, the speaker …
Fell in the punch bowl.
The punch was made of______.
… equal parts of tequila, vodka, rye, gin, and Scotch.
Oh, and some cherry Kool-Aid, because, after all …
…it would otherwise improper to give to children.
If I want to sleep for a long time, I…
Drink that punch. It comes with a built in headache.
For headaches I take______.
no guff from nobody, see?
My Uncle Clyde thinks he’s a hard-boiled Thirties private eye, but…
… it’s hard to take him seriously when all he can do is a poor Humphrey Bogart impression.
Heck, Uncle Clyde doesn’t even have …
a fedora and a trenchcoat!
Frankly, when he wears a muumuu and an Alpine hat, it’s a little hard to…
Dance the watusi.
I want to dance when ________.
I hear the Hokey Pokey.
That song really brings out the
…philosophers who want to know what it’s all about.
Certainly, my purpose in life is to…
Eat jello.
My favorite flavor is_______.
lime because it matches my best suit.
We did Jell-O shots
… at a frat party, and Bill had a few too many.
I do remember the next morning when Bill …
Started drinking again at 9am.
The hair of the dog_____.
… helped, but eventually the dog bites back.
And in Bill’s case …