written by Dr. Seuss.
I like to read about…
pirates in love.
I’ve often dreamed of sailing…
…in a sea of cheese.
I arrived at the river styx…
With a bag of pretzels.
It turned into a real_________.
…pretzel styx orgy!
One of the things I learned is that pretel styx (or sticks) are useful for…
…nostril appendages during congressional hearings.
I also use pretzel sticks ….
…in black magic blood rituals for salt replacement.
After extracting the still-beating heart…
… I passed it around so every member of the medical school class could have a close look.
While holding it, one student said, …
“This looks just like my Great Aunt Edna’s!”
When he cackled maniacally, _____________________
…Great Aunt Edna woke up in the operating room.
She screamed to her nephew,”…
. . . I just saw Heaven. Get me a pen!
She started to write ________________
…a suicide note.
But when I _____
…explained to her that heaven had very limited seating and that she’d failed to call ahead for reservations, Aunt Edna grew furious.
"Now look here, sonny boy ___________
________ When there are grey skies,
I don’t mind the grey skies,
You make them blue, Sonny Boy!"
"If it’s Tuesday. . .
…you get cheap tacos.
On Wednesday…
It’s ham for hump day. Yum.
After slicing the ham I had__________.
a craving for some pineapple.
After slicing the pineapple…
I just stare at it and wonder on the complexity.
But when it’s all peeled and crushed…
I realize the error of my ways. Pineapples have feelings too.
So, I run to join the________.
…French foreign legion.
Soon I was deployed to the nuclear test site…