How do you keep a ferret from ruining your fluffernut sandwich?
Answer: The top shelf.
Q: Where do you put things you want to keep away from Danny DeVito?
a: Acne pads, gasohol, and Ted Kennedy
Q: Name three things a 23 year old floozy is likely to pick up on the way home from work.
---------------
A: Because it just keeps going in circles.
Why did they put Halvsie down?
Answer: The Curly Shuffle
Q. What’s the newest pubic dance craze?
A. Kickers and a ripped turban.
Q. What answer is nearly guaranteed to kill a thread?
A. 20 trillion compact discs.
Q. What did D.J. Kool hide up his ass when he was sentenced to twenty years in prison?
A. A battered suitcase.
Q: How much have I downloaded from Napster?
A: Roman numerals.
nevermind… see above
Q. name the only thing left in the White House when the Clintons left.
a. Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the XFL playoffs.
Q. What do you hope your children will one day outgrow?
A. A long walk on the beach.
What is not the definition of love?
A: They both know the power of the Dark Side.
Mods: Sorry about the sig. [guily child]I think I’ll go shorten it now…[/gc]
Q: What do Darth Vader, Lucifer, and Britney Spears have in common?
A. Matthew Perry’s sunglasses.
Q: What’s a solution to the heartbreak of pinpoint pupils?
A: David Copperfield and Claudia Schiffer
OMG, Zoggie! That was the exact question I was thinking of when I wrote that! I was even listening to Spears at the time. We must have a psychic link though my sig!
Wow that is weird!!! Oh so very vaguely creepy…
<pause>
You listen to Britney Spears?
Ummmm… nooooo… [blank stare] Yeeeesssss…
I actually got the CD from my girlfriend. She now believes that Britney is the devil. Haha. Her loss. I can pin her down and force her to listen to it! (however, I usually reach the limit before she does)
Question: What are three things no one over the age of five believes in?
Answer: Being sexually attracted to your cat.
Q: What is Cosmos Number 1 reason for break-ups?
A: Well I wouldn’t do it!