You and your penis have separate bathrooms?
America is decadent like that, I heard.
I guess if you stretch it a bit he kinda resembles one, but…
Sorry, I was unclear: that is the part I know. I was wondering if Americans don’t use the word beaker other than in a lab?
American here. When I hear beaker, I think of a lab beaker. That’s what came to mind when I read the OP. A non-lab beaker shaped container would usually be called a cup or a glass or a drinking glass, even when it’s made of plastic.
No, but after the reaction I got when I wiped it off on the drapes I might consider it in the future.
For a brief but stunning instant there, the first day this thread was up, I read that as “penis breaker”.
Same thing I thought. Or even share, have one spouse use the hand-shower and the other the bidet. Or have one use the hand-shower or bidet and the other just stand a’tiptoe and use the washbasin.
Hand towels and/or a pack of wet-wipes should do the job at bedside. Sure, in the heat of the action the flowing fluids are part of the whole show but after you stop and start cooling down it can become kind of uncomfortable.
I second this recommendation, and I want that T shirt!
Am I the only one who uses a toothbrush and powdered soap?
What! No SOS pads?
Thirded :::girding loins:::
Question for those that use tissue: doesn’t it break up or tear when you use it? I’ve always used a damp rag…
I don’t understand – unless she hibernates in the bathroom until morning, all the guy has to do is wait until she comes out, then go in and wash off.
In our house, by the way, it’s risky to have water by the bed, because we have cats. More than once I’ve been awakened by the tip-tip-tip of Hestia* delicately drinking out of the glass of water I’ve thoughtfully provided for her. Using the same tingue she uses for washing herself.
If the water is too low, cats will push their heads down into the glass to an alarming degree to get at the water
Besides, I’ve had to clean up water from glasses I’ve knocked over reaching for the lamp or something, on occasion.
*for some reason it’s always Hestia.
Just the thing in the lab and the muppet. Then again the muppet is a thing in a lab too.
That’s generally true, but it hardly matters in this case. I doubt if must of us use penis pitchers, penis ewers, penis bottles, penis cups OR saucers, penis glassware, penis vases, etc., either.
Nope, although a teste tube for sanitizing the balls might be marketable.
Yes. Mine is smaller. 
Me too. Those were hilarious. If you didn’t visit the OP’s link, do it now!
With us, it’s less about getting it off quickly than it is about my wife’s desire to not sleep on messy sheets. Since she’s the one that does the laundry, I have no problem accommodating her.
And some people produce more bodily fluids than others, apparently.
With me, it’s more an issue of cleaning the ceiling than cleaning the sheets. 
Reminds me of Portnoy and the light bulb.