Haiku Madness Part Deux

End internet wrongs.
First Twitter, Facebook. But lay
Off funny cat vids.

Off, funny cat vids!
Get off of my gol-darned phone!
Ain’t got time for that

Ain’t got time for that?!
Funny cat vids - best use of
Time, IMHO.

Time, IMHO,
Keeps flowing like a river,
Says Alan Parsons.

Says Alan Parsons
I have a new project, it’s
An Eye In The Sky

An Eye In The Sky
Used to be a metaphor.
Now they’re all over.

Now they’re all over
Watching us all constantly
Tinfoil hat needed.

Tinfoil hat needed
To pass around while I busk
Heavy metal tunes

Heavy metal tunes?
Howsabout John Mellencamp’s
Little Zinc Houses

Little zinc houses
Are batteries that power
Household devices

Household devices
Vacuum, Range, Microwave
Making life better

Note: According to the Oxford English dictionary and several on-line sources, vacuum has 3 syllables, no matter how you pronounce it…

“No matter how you pronounce it” doesn’t make a lick of sense.

Agreed. And most people pronounce it with two syllables.

When I search “vacuum pronunciation” on Bing I get:


which indicates either 2 or 3 syllables.

Making life better
By keeping my mouth shut as
Long as possible.

Long as possible
Now and forever, “vacuum”
Has two syllables

Has “Two syllables!”
Become this thread’s tribal flag?
Squee!! I’m bi! Kill tri!

Squee, I’m bi, kill tri,
Pour, pive, pix, peven, pate, pine:
Counting is such fun.

Counting is such fun
So are syllable debates
OED is the one truth

OED is the one truth?
Pshaw! Webster’s Second is the
Definitive work.