Haiku Madness Part Deux

A terrible joke:
Funeral song idea -
Pop Goes the Weasel

“Pop Goes the Weasel”
not a musical treasure;
I prefer “Chopsticks”

I prefer “Chopsticks”
but they’re not so practical
with big mac & fries

with big mac and fries
I get a diet soda
It all evens out

It all evens out.
I get more zits and try to
Relive my childhood

Relive my childhood?
Not a goal of mine, really
Happy to be grown

Happy to be grown
In a test-tube. Cheaper than
Buying your own home

Buying your own home
better than renting, they say
don’t know who “they” are

Don’t know who they are
But they sneak in my house and
Eat all my chocolate

Eat all my chocolate?
Yes, I am going to; thanks!
It is very good.

It is very good
to hear to music when doing
a jigsaw puzzle.

A jigsaw puzzle:
How do I prevent the blades
From always breaking?

From always breaking
to then quickly being fixed
gotta use some glue

Gotta use some glue
To fix that stool for my wife.
She fell on her butt.

She fell on her butt
Which is much better than her
Falling on my butt

Falling on my butt.
Again. It’s now time to call …
the Professionals

The professionals
Are not needed fore we are the
The pros of haikus.

The pros of haikus
Are far greater than the cons,
Or we’d not do this.

Or we’d not do this
We’d do free verse, sonnets, or
Raunchy limericks

Raunchy limericks -
like doing tricks. Haiku can
trick you. Take your pick.