Haiku Madness

If she has the yen.
Or if he has the yen and she
is a prostitute

If she has the yen
And I am sporting my franc
Then there will be pound

ETA: I have to leave this in here anyways…I like it way too much!

<ack>

Is a prostitute
called by any other name?
Mojave Stinkbush

Mojave Stinkbush
Toughest gal in the West 'til
She met Deadwood Dick

She met Deadwood Dick
and soon found he was no hick
never missed a trick

Never missed a trick
En route to bridge victory
The game soon bored me

The game soon bored me
Lions losing once again
I turned on Oprah

I turned on Oprah
But had to turn her down 'cuz
I don’t date rich chicks

I don’t date rich chicks
but not for lack of trying
I like heiresses

I like heiresses
Marry 'em, then kill 'em off
That’s my life’s motto.

That’s my life’s motto,
still E pluribus unum;
not Rick Perry’s, though.

Not Rick Perry’s though
Some people may ask who’s he?
Others say I know

Others say, “I know!”
He’s Journey’s lead vocalist!"
They’re thinking of Steve.

“Others say I know.”
They say “I know” or I know?
Use punctuation!

ETA: crap I knew this would happen

They’re thinking of Steve
Who yelled “Use punctuation!”
At the typesetter

At The Typesetter
that new bar for newsie types
I had a cold beer

I had a cold beer
A large glass that came free with
the wienerschnitzel

The wienerschnitzel
My wiener in your schnitzel
Single entendre?

single entendre?
that chick’s off on a bender,
lemme go bend her!

lemme go bend her!
BOOM goes mah wienerschnitzel!
the date ends early