Turn you into Job
Or better, turn you to Gob
It’s an Illusion
“It’s an illusion.”
“Pray tell, how do you know?” “I
made my saving throw.”
Made my saving throw
returning a grenade to
its rightful owner
Its rightful owner
Doesn’t want his dog’s crap back –
Gee, I wonder why?
Gee, I wonder why
Asparagus makes pee stink?
Uncle Cecil knows!
Uncle Cecil knows
Absolutely everything
In the whole wide world
In the whole wide world
and up until this moment
you had not read this
You had not read this
Nothing in your life is real.
You do not exist.
You do not exist.
You are only in my mind.
Only I am real.
Only I am real
I rule all I see and I
Am Zestfully clean
Am zestfully clean
am I? I am. I just bathed
for tonight’s big date
For tonight’s big date,
I sprung for the very best;
Ribbed for her pleasure!
Ribbed for her pleasure!
Yet when she saw my package,
I was the one ribbed.
I was the one ribbed
Now I see someone called “Eve”
Without a dangly bit.
Without a dangly bit
I can’t tell people’s genders
At Fatty Nude Beach
At Fatty Nude Beach,
When Moby Dick beached himself,
Nobody noticed.
Nobody noticed
that I double dipped the chip
I am so sneaky
I am so sneaky.
I run naked through large crowds.
Make that “so streaky.”
“Make that so streaky
the lice will have racing lanes”
I told my stylist
I told my stylist
I want a reverse mohawk
Hair on sides, not top