“I need Viagra”
Say men, all while women just
get the fucking shaft.
Get the fucking Shaft?
Are you kidding? He’s John Shaft,
he’s a mean mother.
He’s a mean mother
trucker, a viking bastard
A rotten ice hole
A rotten ice hole
and some dirty tawdry slats
just plain left me cold
Just plain left me cold
Mr. Freeze’s awful puns
It’s ICE to see you
It’s ICE to see you
Internet Creepy Experts
You are their hero.
You are their hero
Their grinder, sub, and hoagie
I’m just a Po-Boy
I’m just a Po-Boy
Though my story’s seldom told;
I will ease your mind.
I will ease your mind.
Or squander my existence
Such are promises
Such are promises
When it comes to the dishes
I will break them all
I will break them all,
short or tall, giant or small,
I will break them all.
I will break them all
Bottles, windows, and bell jars
I’m Master Breaker
I’m Master Breaker.
I’d rather be fishing and
The Master Baiter.
The Master Baiter,
that is I. I stroke it to
the left, then the right.
The left, then the right
Mitt Romney, the flip-flopper
Just looking for votes
Just looking for votes
Shaking hands, kissing babies
giving reacharounds…
giving reacharounds?
I am an expert at that
said the octopus
said the octopus
Come into my garden in
the shade, Ringo Starr.
the shade, Ringo Starr
a darker version of light
courteous Sun King
Courteous Sun King
Quando paramucho, says
Señor Mostaza