Haiku Madness

Codfish are spawning!
Whales are humping! Minnows are
mating! Spring is here!

Mating! Spring is here!
Time for a lecture about
The birds and the bees.

The birds and the bees
Are strange to me, unlike the
Fruits and the farries

Fruits and the farries -
Sounds like something you would hear
At the Freakers’ Ball

At the Freakers’ Ball
I shall flirt and party and
do the Mustard Beat

Do the Mustard Beat!
Fap-fappity-fap-fap
It’s so addictive!

It’s so addictive!
I can’t seem to stop reading
The SDMB

The SDMB.
Has nothing to do with sex,
drugs, music or bands.

Drugs, music, or bands
or sex – can’t make up my mind,
I’ll do everything.

I’ll do everything
Wash my hands and comb my hair
I’m a well groomed groom

I’m a well groomed groom,
Looking for my pie-eyed bride;
Seen her anywhere?

Seen her anywhere?
The girl who broke my heat. Tell
me, have you seen her?

Me: Have you seen her?
Some dude: Seen her? I did her!
Story of my life.

Story of my life
nobody would believe it
Horribly Gruesome

Horribly gruesome
Scene of decapitation
Spawned a great headline

Spawned a great headline,
Jane Fonda did, when she gave
Sexual counsel

Sexual counsel.
God knows how bad I need that.
Can you give me some?

Can you give me some?
I am all out, can’t you see
And you have so much

And you have so much
Gallons of yummy mustard
Some for my wiener?

Some for my weiner
And a little for my beans
Both like attention