Both like attention
And I like my weiner to
Stand at attention
“Stand at attention,
you maggots,” said the sergeant.
“Can I sit?” I asked.
“Can I sit?” I asked
Doc said yes then he dropped his
lunch in the body
lunch in the body
hard metal merges with flesh
turn this world to rust
turn this world to rust
and we’ll all have much more time
'cause rust never sleeps
'cause rust never sleeps
When you don’t know who to trust.
It’s dust in the wind.
It’s dust in the wind
It’s carry on wayward son
It’s what’s on my mind
“It’s what’s on my mind”
Said the piano mover
When the rope gave way.
When the rope gave way
And my handgun misfired
I became pro-life
I became pro-life
Then I got a gun and killed
Planned Parenthood staffs.
Planned Parenthood staffs
weren’t ready for me. “We
ne’er expected this!”
Ne’er expected this
Thread to last such a long time
Will we hit “5 grand”?
Will we hit 5 grand?
Never fear, dear, I already
owe much more than that.
Owe much more than that
And I may as well sell my
Bieber autograph
Bieber autograph
Solicited by teen gal
Waiting fruitlessly
Waited fruitlessly
'cause that damn banana truck
Stood me up again
Stood me up again,
by golly, and I even
paid for Viagra
Paid for Viagra
But they sent me V1agr@
Can’t trust spam these days!
Can’t trust spam these days!
I’d go ahead and put my
Money on Alpo.
Money on Alpo
Money on dog whisperers
I’m so doggone broke