Haiku Madness

This holiday time
I’ll lay off the eggnog. I’ll
smoke reefer instead!

Smoke reefer instead?
A holly, jolly Christmas
Means giving some cheer

Means giving some cheer,
Rah-Rah For The Haiku Thread!
It goes without end.

It goes without end,
the bullshit at work. Why can’t
I find a rich wife?

I find a rich wife
And it turns out she’s married
To some dude named Rich

To some dude named Rich
Theatre critic we hated
He was so damn Frank

He was so damn Frank
He was also very Curt
Please, sir, babble on!

Please, sir, babble on!
“Midriff hully-gully ciao,
Serpentine cayenne!”

Serpentine Cayenne
A tough belt to replace on
This Porsche model

This Porsche model
Guaranteed to get me laid!
Not like that Corvette

Not like that Corvette,
“Excellence was Expected”
The Porsche is king

The Porsche is king
Despite what you’ve heard 'bout that
Dude from Tupelo

Dude from Tupelo?
Okay for you, but I want
Tupelo Honey.

Tupelo Honey,
New Orle-ans Molasses,
Santa Fe Sugar.

Sante Fe sugar,
let’s step out tonight and do
the Texas Two-Step.

The Texas two-step–
Cowboy countrification
Of the pas de deux.

Of the pas de deux
the ballet instructors mark
le menage a trois

Le menage a trois,
Quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, and
That’s a neuf for me.

That’s a neuf for me.
Le menage a trois avec
Quatre le nerf balls.

Quatre le nerf balls
American boys in France
Dance naked for sport