With too many guys,
the problem is that they are
chauvinist sex pigs
Chauvinist Sex Pigs:
The best punk rock band of the
'80s! (Not really)
'80s! (Not really)
Jeopardy stumper. Answer…
“What is the best age?”
What is the best age
To marry and settle down?
69 is fine
69 is fine
When all other positions
Have been exhausted
“Have been exhausted;
Forced through the muffler of life” -
Guru Daihatsu
Guru Daihatsu
Learned fast how to stop the car
“I guess them’s the brakes”
“I guess them’s the brakes,
And them’s the rearview mirrors –
Wait…where’s the ashtray?”
Wait, where’s the ashtray,
where hot ash goes to molder?
In your heart, that’s where!
In your heart, that’s where
All feelings start. And that’s where
They take root and grow.
They take root and grow -
Flowers, children, ideas.
Oh, and wisdom teeth.
Oh, and wisdom teeth;
Some mouths are not big enough.
Some minds aren’t, either.
Some minds aren’t either.
A mind is a terrible thing.
For some people, yes.
For some people, “Yes,
I like chocolate.” For others,
“No, I LOVE chocolate.”
No. I love chocolate,
vanilla and strawberry.
No ice cream denied.
No ice cream denied
Unless you are allergic
To milk, not ice cream
(My stepdad was my inspiration there)
To milk, not ice cream
did Elsie owe her comfort;
thankful for warm flows.
Thankful for warm flows?
Show your appreciation:
visit a hotsprings
visit a hotsprings
like James Brown will often do
Stick a toe in. Owwww!
Stick a toe in. Owww!
Not there, you stupid maroon!
My bottom hurts now