A full moon tonight
Do folks truly go crazy?
Or is that a myth?
A full moon tonight
Benicio will howl soon
and so will Lupine
Or is that a myth?
The wench did wonder out loud.
The scotsman proved it.
The Scotsman proved it
Butt against glass is pressed ham
Don’t ask for gravy
don’t ask for gravy
on french fries with mayonnaise
KFC shooting
KFC shooting
They got the colonel, oh no
Blood-splattered white suit
Blood-spattered white suit
Very hard to clean, James Bond.
This will cost extra.
“This will cost extra”
She said with her whorish smile.
Where’s an ATM?
Where’s an ATM?
The blonde likes me, I can tell.
Must hide the receipts.
Threadwinner so far, I’d say. 
“Must hide the receipts,”
said the Mob accountant, Sal,
as he wiped his brow.
As he wiped his brow,
His greatest fear was confirmed:
No toilet paper.
No toilet paper!
What a dread realization -
How I would hate that.
No toilet paper
In this inn, staying here
Is not number one
How I would hate that
My turn to be too slow here
Like some evil race
like some evil race
of snakelike eyeless monters
I lurk in darkness
I lurk in darkness
Eternal life with sharp teeth;
Call me vampire.
Like some evil race
Of yowling, starved refugees –
The cats in the yard.
“Call me vampire.”
Thus begins Melville’s take on
Dracula’s story.
Not sure which one to go with, so I am going to stick with the vampire line
call me a vampire
and I will tear out your heart
werewolves are better
ETA:
pervs clad as critters
are dangerous to us all
they trick us with fur
They trick us with fur
but PETA scowls, flings fake blood,
screams, “Fur is murder!”