A German Sheppard
Is a smart dog. E.g. note
Who picks up the dung.
Who picks up the dung?
Not my daughter, I tell you
And yet it’s “her” dog
And yet it’s her dog
Who gives me the best kisses
(she claims she loves me)
(She claims she loves me)
From two hundred miles away
Covfefe, all I need
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“Covfefe.” All I need:
Another half-assed, made-up,
Trendy-to-be word.
Trendy: To be word.
No, wait. Ditch the W,
And the D. Or not.
And the D, or not
the D; that is the question—
No D is just rumpf
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No dis, just rump. F
That! Rump’s a dis, unless it’s
Said roasting a roast.
Said roasting a roast
Spoke: loudly broaching a boast
I’ll toast you a toast!
I’ll toast you toast
Crispy just like a Melba
Prefer brown or white?
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Prefer brown or white?
Are you referring to teeth?
Definitely white
Definitely white
Is the colour of clown skin
Not the rest of us
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Not the rest of us
But the busy few’s who keeps
The ho hum humming.
The ho hum humming.
Also the hum ho hoeing
And who who whoing
And who who whoing
All day long into the night
Freakin’ asshole owls
Freakin’ asshole owls
Don’t smell as nice as barn owls
And are much smaller.
And are much smaller
Than typical testicles
So says my doctor
“So,” says my doctor,
“If it hurts when you go like
This, don’t go like this.”
This, don’t go like this.
Go like that, and know God hates
Those who go like this.
Those who go like this?:
A spider doing push-ups
On a mirror, natch.