Haiku Madness

And carpe diem?
My life is so mixed up I
Can’t carpe annos

Can’t carpe annos
Can eat all parts of the carp
Except the butthole

Except the butthole
The Sphinx has a grand entrance
that’s not a tight squeeze.

That’s not a tight squeeze.
You seen me in my prom suit?
Cheeseburger’s revenge.

Cheeseburger’s revenge -
Been on the table all day
Soaking up sunlight.

Soaking up sunlight
In my Tower of Silence
Warm excarnation

Warm excarnation
Coming soon, to my front lawn
Trick or treat indeed

Trick or treat indeed
Apples and floss for the kids
Yeah, I am that guy

Yeah, I am that guy
Who believes in afterlife
And still agnostic.

And, still agnostic?
I don’t belive that you are!
Faith is a gift, yo.

Faith is a gift, yo
But please make sure that she is
Home before midnight

“Home before midnight?”
asked Doug showing his teeth. “Ma,
I don’t feed ‘til two.”

I don’t feed 'til two,
And I don’t sleep 'til seven,
And our dreams go on

And our dreams go on,
Except on the Titanic;
Our hearts will go on.

Our hearts will go on
Our lungs will still breathe, if our
Sportsball team loses

Sportsball team loses.
No World Series for Bosox.
But way to go Pats!

But way to go Pat’s
office team who won dressed as
Michael J. Pollards.

Michael J. Pollard’s
best role: Andy Griffith show
Barney Fife’s cousin

Barney Fife’s cousin
Might also be his brother;
Mayberry yokels.

Mayberry yokels
Gomer, Goober, Floyd Lawson
Nip it in the bud