“I’ve got a bottle of Kahlua at my place. Wanna split it with me?”
Not sure if it will work. It worked on me, but I’m not a chick.
[QUOTE=pbbth]
Oh, if you want really bad pick up lines I can tell you that the worst I have heard have been, “Just so you know, I enjoy eating pussy” …
[/QUOTE]
Oh, I don’t know…that one doesn’t seem so bad.
[QUOTE=MadTheSwine]
<snip>
“Your clothes must be made of mirrors cus I can see myself in your pants.”
[/QUOTE]
I heard this as -
“Did you wash your pants in Windex… cuz I can see myself in them.”
Well, maybe not a spoken line, but how’s about drawing a cartoon of yourself with your tongue hanging out and your eyes bulging out on a cocktail napkin with the caption “You’re beautiful!” and sending it over to my table with a drink? 
“Does this smell like chloroform?”
I do not now nor have I ever condoned date rape but this is the best freaking pick-up line ever if only because it made me fall on the floor laughing when I heard it.
How’s about walking up to your chick of choice, break the fourth wall and declare, “I’d buy that for a dollar”.
For some reason, the first thing I thought of when I saw the OP’s username and the question he was asking was:
“You know, I give really good piggy-back rides.”
I’m sure there’s an inneundo in there somewhere.
“For you, I might just go straight.”
“I just wrote some Austin Powers-Dr. Evil slash. Wanna help me act it out?”
I’ve always been partial to "Do you have some Indian in you? No? Do want one?
I almost told a girl today that she had a “tastee ass”. I mean, it was just such a fine ass…I don’t know what came over me, it was on the tip of my tongue… but I ended up complimenting her on her piercings instead. Thank God.
If I told you that you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?
[QUOTE=MadTheSwine]
Need some surefire lines that are gonna get me some action with the classy broads that hang out in the seedy bars and dives I frequent.
[/QUOTE]
If seedy bars and dives are your thing, just come to Thailand. No need to open your mouth even. Not sure how “classy” the ladies will be, though.
Stateside, though, I always found just looking them in the eyes and licking my eyebrows worked wonders.
Ask her if she would like a Boulder handshake.
(I have no idea what a Boulder handshake is. It was my second day in Boulder CO and I was approached with this “offer”. I said no thank you. It might work, though).
Hello, I’m incredibly wealthy.
“Your skin is so soft and smooth. I’d tell you I want to peel it off and wear it for myself but you’d probably think I was weird.”
I can tell you from personal experience that this is not an effective pickup line!
Marc
eleaorigby, I’m almost sure that the “Boulder Handshake” is one of those leave-you-guessing type things. Legend (amongst very drunken boys) is that one party uses a hand to “shake” a part of the anatomy on the other side. Another version is more to-the-point. I have never seen or heard even semi-reliable stories of this actually happening.
Well, I’ve always (ie, once) had good luck with:
Me: So how’s that working out for you? 
Them: How’s what working out for me? 
Me: Being gorgeous. 
Them: Awww… :o
Note: She was already pretty knackered by this point, and had a pretty big crush on me, so I probably could have said that I just shit my pants and she still would have taken me back to her place.
[QUOTE=Siam Sam]
Not sure how “classy” the ladies will be, though..
[/QUOTE]
Or how actually, you know, female. 
“Bartender, another beer for me, and a rohypnotini for the lady!”
I’ve never had the guts to do this one, but I always figured if I’m ever single and a little drunk, I would try with…
“Hi there. My name’s Tristan… I saw you, figured I would come up, offer to buy you a drink and engage you in some conversation. See what kind of lady you are. You’re very attractive, and seem nifty, from what I can see so far. But also, I am impatient, so I was wondering if we could just go have sex, and I could get to know you better afterwards?”
also:
“…look, I’m a mature person. You’re a mature person. So let’s get out of here, and go do what mature people do.”