Thanks Emiliana. I would like to hear your story. Or if you already told me during a blackout, just pass on the link 
Thread relocated to MPSIMS from IMHO at the OP’s request.
Horseshit.
Slee
Atheist/Agnostic with 11 years in A.A.
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I drank more and more, would sneak drinks when others weren’t looking so I was drinking 2 or 3 times as many as they are, would drink alone, would avoid eating so that the alcohol could work faster and harder, would have times I didn’t drink when it felt creepy wrong not to be drinking, and would worry about it being out of control.
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I tried to stop but it was hard, I would stumble and stumble, but finally did quit.
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I went about 3 months (I think) without drinking and it felt like I could say no to alcohol. You know, maybe I could drink, just moderately. So I carefully started drinking, just a little, mindfully, cautiously, deciding each day when I’d had enough and would stop for the evening, all very conscious.
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In 10 days I was 100% of the way back to #1 above. That’s when I knew.
I certainly did escalate the amount I was drinking, but can’t say for sure if it was more the case that I needed more for the same inebriation, or needed more inebriation, or some of each.
Until step #4 above the difficulty was not knowing if I really needed to stop. After, it sucked, it felt physically ugly and I felt somewhat worthless, but gradually improved. The nightmares in which I would suddenly realized I had forgotten not to drink and was in the middle of drinking, those were the last symptom to go. I think it was probably 15 or 20 years before the last of them (unless of course I have one tonight).
I should say, I had a pretty high bottom, in AA parlance. That is, the worst point I reached, my “bottom”, was not that bad. I kept my job. I kept my house. I didn’t keep my marriage but there was another big reason for that. I almost ruined everything – almost. I was very lucky.
One thing I didn’t see mentioned – whatever you do, please do NOT just quit cold turkey on your own. Try and check into a detox program. Going cold turkey nearly killed a relative of mine.
Dude, it’s a metaphor. Like “eargasm”. Let it go already.
It depends on how much you drink. But, yeah, going cold turkey can be deadly. HMSI, your employer may cover a detox program even if your insurance doesn’t. I realize you don’t want your employer to know–who does?–but do what you have to do to stay safe and get healthy.
Here’s an interesting article about alternatives to AA (medical treatment). Might be worth talking with your doctor.
This is one of those things I have always wondered about.
At what “level” of “alcoholic” do you have to be for this to be a concern? I am not even sure how to phrase this correctly for that matter.
Yeah, I am being lazy and could probably do some research on my own…but since some people in the know are here I figured I might as well ask.
PS. Congrats to anybody and everybody here who “had a problem” and managed to take care of it so to speak.
Sorry, this is the article I was actually looking for. It’s really interesting, about medical treatment for alcohol addiction.
Spend a little time reflecting on this:
If any other person in your life exerted this much control over your actions, parent, boss, spouse, coworker, you’d be fighting it tooth and nail with every fibre of your being. Because you’d feel enslaved, dominated, trapped and powerless.
So…why aren’t you fighting for your freedom now!
As I said, something to reflect on!
Wishing you luck, this is a difficult challenge you face. If it helps, we all believe in you.
Qadgop the Mercotan has posted about this at least once but I’m not good with the search function. And I don’t know myself. Never got to that point.
Well… I can go 2-3 days with only very minor symptoms, and my downfall thus far has been the notion that I can just have a couple of drinks without going overboard. Clearly that is false, now I know it. With that awareness, I think I have a decent shot at just quitting without medical help. Though I have a serious problem, I am not yet in crisis, so I have to try the simple approach before I stamp that stigma on myself and panic everyone around me.
I know probably lots of people have had the exact same thought process and failed, so maybe it’s not very smart. But I feel like I have to try that first.
And… I’m now at the conclusion of 1 day sans alcohol. Day 2 will not be a problem. I’ll find an AA meeting by day 3, and think about day 4 when it gets here.
Cheers all.
Best of luck.
Okay, just be careful. If you start to feel crappy, take yourself to the hospital, ASAP. 
It wouldn’t bother me at all. I see women that I find attractive all the time. Why should it be any different with a man. Are you saying that it would be abnormal for a heterosexual man to find another man attractive? If so, why? Finding someone attractive doesn’t necessarily mean that you want to hop in bed with them. I would have no problem marrying a man that finds other men attractive.
NSFW - The following link is not suitable for a workplace environment.
I’m not sure just what you are tying to point out.
You may not have any prob marrying a man who finds other men attractive. But I’d bet it would be a very diff story if the man enjoyed having occasional sexual escapades) (specifically meaning sexual affairs) with various other men. Wouldn’t that be a diff story?
If you know you should quit, then quit. Acknowledging that you have the problem is the first step and you’ve done that.
Do you have certain nights that you are most likely to drink? If so, what if you put up roadblocks to drinking well in advance of those nights? For example, if you can predict a night you are most likely to drink, make plans that will get in the way of drinking. Offer to babysit nieces/nephews. Visit a friend who isn’t a drinker. Make plans with someone to go a movie. Could this work for you?
Do you have any hobbies that you haven’t done in a while? Getting excited about something new could help you stay away from drinking.
The notion that you can have a couple of drinks without going overboard–contrary to your lived experience–is pretty much the definition of the alcoholic. Even if you don’t always go overboard, you can’t control when you do.
Congrats on getting to this point, HMSI. Let us know what you think of your AA meeting.