I hate this product and,

Are you shitting me?

I have never heard of Pinata, why do you want to be violent or non-violent to them ?

As someone who is in charge of the Pinata for a Holiday Fest coming up, (and having survived supervising 4 kindergarten pinata (heh) paloozas with no injuries, I am shocked to find out how much the damn mezo-american confection equine costs and shall offset the freakin’ price by asking all my friends for their kids Halloween candy.
What’s next?

Banning Whack a Mole? and dare I even say it Skee Ball you know…put the ball in the hole
When will this PC end and we can return to the halcyon days of Tom and Jerry’s mindless violence?

I repeat: Are you shitting me?

Pinatas are paper mache’ animals, covered in bright paper, and filled with candy. They’re like the size of a dog or something.

A bunch of little kids gather around and you hang it from a tree and blindfold the kids and let them whack at the pinata with sticks until it breaks open and candy showers over the children and their little teeth rot. It’s great fun!!!

Why would you want these people to suck your dick? They don’t even know how to make something that is meant to be destroyed. I would think you would want more qualified people to blow you.

But… we have many beautiful pinatas for your birthday celebration! Each one, filled with little surprises!

Now we come to the real issue here. As mentioned before sometime younger kids have trouble breaking the widely available commerical piñata. The reason is that the mass produced ones are made with cardboard covered with bright paper. The cardboard is perforated to make it easier to break open; but it’s still much more difficult than a traditional papier mâché ones. Rather than make traditional versions, commercial makers invented the pull cord type that is much easier to open for the kiddos, though less fun, IMHO.

“non-violent pinata”???


As an ethically sound human of non-judgemental sexual orientation and irrelevant gender, I of course would only barter for (not buy, which would only facilitate capitalistic monetarism) a piñata that has been made from recycled materials by a commune of leprosy-disadvantaged minority tribespeople, on a fair trade basis.

Rather than depicting gender-centric, demeaning carnivorous stereotypes, the piñata will be shaped into non-representational stereotypes of oppression, such as cubes, spheres, and swastikas.

Since ribbons have militaristic connotations, the piñata I obtain will open automatically once the vibrations of the children’s Tibetan chanting has reached the properly karmic level, and will gently distribute unbleached cotton wraps, each containing a small amount of organic tofu, to each child, on a meritocratic basis, beginning with the most disabled and oppressed small-person of ethnically challenged origin, and working its way up to the most privileged, who will get the smallest piece of tofu, and will like it dammit, because people are starving in this world.

It will then be recycled.

Peter: Hey, did you see the big ass pinata I got?
Brian: I sure hope candy comes out of that.


jjimm! Good to see you again!


OK, now I’m freaking out. I went to link to “Athena” which I also think of when I hear this phrase (“she welcomes me with open arms, and open legs”) and none of the lyrics I can find include this line. Am I losing it?? Does anyone else remember this??

Whew. It’s “You Better, You Bet”. Those two always blob together in my mind. I guess I am nuts, but in a different way.
Never mind!

That’s correct. And back in the day, no self-respecting party-giver would buy a pinata. You make that sucker. You take care with every strip of cut, curled tissue paper that’s applied to it. The birthday kid gets to take home what’s left of the beast.

Sigh…We’ve managed to fuck up the simplest pleasures in this make-a-buck society.

Fuckin foreigners. Don’t even know about the goddam good-old American tradition of the Piñata?

Fuck you, we don’t need your foreign influences in our country.

Ooohh!. I hope there is a plethora of them!

Pepe. Do jou even know what a plethora ees?

Side note: I once gave my then-girlfriend’s sister a shirt that said that in small letters across the bust. :smiley:

An educational video about the mistreatment of pinatas:


Really, you people are all animals!

I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Actually, I was at a 3rd birthday party recently where they had one of those pull-string pinatas. It sucked.

Could it be that I am upset about something else and I am taking it out on the makers of these non violent pinatas.
Nope, they suck.