Dump her.
Fantastic username/post combo here
It can also mean prior to a near fatal accident.
I cannot be be happy if I am not true to mine own self.
There WAS commonality before 1974 but, the girl I knew died the day she got ‘saved’ She has been totally brainwashed. I think the biggest problem is that we don’t respect one another. I cannot respect a Trump supporter. She cannot respect a progressive Democrat.
How so? I advocate FOR TRUTH, a Trump-Q-MyPillow disciple HATES TRUTH.
She has been told by many doctors. She believes they are misinformed and/or part of the ‘conspiracy.’
Happiness requires. 'To Thine Own Self Be True.’
Also don’t be a borrower or a lender.
No, he really doesn’t. All that line by itself says is that he’s passionate about fighting disinformation. And, in context, it’s clear that he is about fighting that particular disinformation.
The issue with Trumpists and Q followers is not that they care about the truth. It’s that they would rather believe in conspiracy theories that tell them what they want to hear, rather than observe reality. The problem is that they then use that belief to justify doing things that are objectively harmful to others, like refusing to get a vaccine.
Yes, the OP probably does need to decide their priorities, to pick the battles that matter most. And, for once, I can confidently say what that one is: she needs to get vaccinated.
In fact, I wonder if some sort of negotiation on that front is possible. The OP could promise not to bring up other political things if she’ll just get the jab. He can point out that he himself is fine. He can promise that, if any of her wild conspiracy theories come true, he’ll fight together with her.
But I can’t get behind the idea that the OP is “acting just like them.” The problem with “them” is not their passion. It is their devotion to falsehood even as even their own eyes and ears tell them they are wrong. And it is that this devotion has led them to act in harmful ways.
Ask what she thinks Jesus meant when he told Satan, “it is said, 'Do not put the Lord your God to the test.”
It’s what Evangelicals essentially are doing. They believe God will protect them from Covid even if they take no precautions against it whatsoever. Because they are specially favored.
(As I posted in another thread) Update to an old punchline: “I sent you social distancing, masks and vaccines. What were you expecting?”
This is possibly a hijack but we’re 72 posts in…
I wonder if it might be possible to teach critical thinking in the abstract.
Like, not talking to a trump supporter about trump, but just having a conversation about critical thinking, about skepticism and standards of evidence. The trumpist would probably agree, but think of themselves as someone who does already think skeptically.
Then, maybe days later, when they’re talking about how Hunter Biden was behind the Cuban missile crisis or whatever, you could refer back to what they agreed about wrt critical thinking.
It would be an interesting experiment anyway. I’d guess they’d just try to change the subject: it’s hard (for anyone) to admit being wrong, but the cognitive dissonance would be hard to maintain.
I don’t know where he heard it, but my brother always says that a marriage can survive without love, but it can’t survive without respect. Over the years I’ve seen that holds true. If that’s the status quo, the marriage can only fail. How to get the respect BACK? I’ll have to reflect on that.
It seems to me that they’re fine with violating a lot of time-honored precepts. For example, to them the ends justify the means because the other side isn’t fighting fair, so it’s a pre-emptive strike. It’s right because…bandwagon, glittering generalities, complex questions, JAQing off, flimsy sources, etc., it’s all good. They “know” they’re right and the rest is just details. Trump says the vax is unnecessary but he gets boosted and many of them don’t flinch so consistency isn’t really necessary, either.
I always like the parable of the drowning man for responding to such “arguments”.
You know, that’s probably true. And it CERTAINLY cannot survive with NEITHER.
To get the respect back would require a concerted effort by both parties. Which doesn’t seem in the cards for the OP.
Has the OP ever checked in as to his age, financial situation or kids? I did see he said he was disabled, but I don’t know the implications of that. Because I’m amazed they have stayed together this long. I’m not sure what positives it would take for me to stick with someone I felt about the way he speaks of his wife.
I more or less gave up on convincing others of facts when my sister told me, at a family dinner in front of everyone, “Well, it is my opinion that we didn’t go to the Moon, and opinions can’t be wrong.” and everyone just nodded in agreement.
I wish I’d had the Asimov quote handy at the time, not that it would have made a difference.
I mean, this is true, but it’s really for the flavor. 
If he’s been with his wife since 1974, he’s at least 60, and probably 70 or above.
Like the OP, I have difficulty not saying things and not challenging misinformation. The thing is, though, you’ve already done that. You wife knows you disagree with her. You’ve made your point. YOU have done your part on the side of truth.
She, however, is rejecting reality. That’s on her, and not something you can change. The harder you try, the more she’ll dig in. Reality says you have two choices:
- Learn to live with an Evangelical Trump supporter. You’ve had decades of practice in this one.
- Leave the Evangelical Trump supporter.
The third option, “change the Evangelical Trump supporter,” is not on the table.
I don’t know what I would do in your situation. Option 1. is the cheapest and easiest (in practical terms), but it’s obviously got a pretty heavy cost. Option 2. probably feels like losing: you’re losing your wife, of course, but also losing the battle to convert her to your side. You know she’s capable of conversion, because you’ve seen her do it, the wrong way, twice.
Hmm… maybe there’s something there. What was successful in converting her to Evangelicalism, and keeping her there? What was successful in converting her to Trumpism? I’m guessing it’s the emotional hit from an Evangelical service, and the rush of righteous anger from watching Fox. Can you think of a way to give her the same kind of emotional rush that doesn’t involve a group of hateful assholes?
If I were him, I’d be more annoyed at a parent who thinks that their child is their property to be given or taken away as a means of punishment.
This is the part I don’t really get. So, you’ve been at odds for going on nearly 50 years? It doesn’t sound like Fox News, or Trumpism, is the source of your problems. This may be a classic example of “irreconcilable differences.”
Having said that, I work in an office and in a community where support for Trump is strong. Invariably, what I encounter are people who are relying on incorrect, or horribly biased, information, which they are accepting uncritically.
So I think the first step towards extricating themselves from Trumpism is to slowly remove the misinformation. Try not watching the news at all. Then, after a month or so, maybe introduce something like PBS Newshour. They’ll be no shouting to grab your attention, but the calming recitation of facts may slowly, over time, start to seep into the unconscious. Admittedly, it’s a slow and tedious process, but it offers some chance for recovery from irrational extremist thinking.