LOL tracer! Whoops, my bad! 
And thank you Ayesha…my first entrance in the Pit. Had a shitty weekend with my mother calling me fat, and DAMN if he didn’t just push my buttons.
I am not going to jump into the foray, Byz and others are doing a great job without my help, besides, I stated my thoughts on the subject on the “Give that girl a sandwich” thread.
Just to clarify something that really means squat to this debate, the misconception that. . .
. . . really isn’t correct.
I recently saw a documentary on Marilyn Monroe. One of the things that surprised me was that for most of Marilyn’s stardom, she ranged between a size 2 to size 8. She only looked voluptuous due to her curves and the camera, but she was actually a small woman. I wish I could remember the exact dress sizes, but the documentary stated that the dress she wore in Gentlemen Prefer Blonde as well as the dress she wore during her Happy Birthday Mr. President performance were a size 6 (or something close). Also, let’s not forget that her measurements were 37-23-36, hardly a size 14.
Anyway. . . .
I can understand that everyone has their own taste when choosing a partner. I prefer dark hair, dark eyes, tall, and muscular builds, myself, but so fuckin what? Thank God we all have different tastes, otherwise, there would be a lot of lonely people in the world.
I don’t think that Byz or anyone else is saying that you should be attracted to overweight women (or blondes or redheads or tall or short or thin or fat . . .) they are simply saying that overweight people deserve just as much respect as anyone else and they have every right to wear whatever they choose.
Mark - You ignorant asshole. Too bad that you are subjected to look at fat people who haven’t ran their wardrobe past you for approval. I can’t see how looking at them even compares to the disgusting public display you have shown here.
>^,^<
KITTEN
Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point.
I would be interested to see if all the women who condemn men who state outright that they would not be interested in a heavy or large woman as a romantic partner would be willing to take a solemn oath that they never choose their potential male romantic partners based on arbitrary and uncontrollable physical characteristics. This could include anything from body hair to male pattern baldness to weight to whatever.
Caveat: I will head off anyone who wishes to start with “You’re-just-like-all-the-other-b;ah-blah-blah” by stating that my wife is 5’5" and is a size 18.
I’m 5’2" and weigh 160. I’m usually about 145, but it was a rough Summer. As I’ve mentioned many times on this board, I do charity work in Nepal. I have seen only a few overweight people in Nepal and no-one whom I would consider obese. Most of the people weigh about 80 pounds. I, of course, look like an Amazon to them. And their cultural mores do not prohibit them from saying so. This caused me a great deal of distress in my early years of working there. I got really sick and tired of people meeting me and saying, “You’re so fat”.
But the funny thing is, Nepali people also eat a lot of food. They stay thin because they work very hard and have very little fat in their diets. So whenever I was eating with people, they would say to me, “You’re not eating enough”.
Finally one day I said, “Make up your minds. I’m too fat or I should eat more–which is it?” Fortunately everyone laughed, and I’ve since gotten over being sensitive to their remarks about my weight.
Don’t get me wrong–I love life. I’m just finding it harder and harder to keep myself amused.
So what you’re saying is that she took the oath?
< GD&R >
(Sigh) Nothing like over sensitive, obese people on a diatribe. I did state that this was only MY opinion, which I do not expect others to follow.
Now, women of Monroe’s stature I liked. I enjoyed the acceptable ‘heavier’ standards of the 1950s. I do not like the forms similar to the gaudy girl in the Drew Carry show.
As for the scariest quote of mine, examine the facts and statistics. In the 1960s, most of the kids were thin. There were many plump kids but they WERE PLUMP ALL OVER and solid. Vigorous play activity was the norm and parents were not afraid to discipline their little farts.
In the 1970s Demented Dr. Spock came out with his book that coddles youngsters, time out instead of a sharp smack on the ass (NOW - BEFORE YOU ALL SCREAM IN RAGE, I SAID SMACK AND NOT BEATING). Shortly after, kids were having their folks hauled into court if they were physically slapped. (On COPS, one episode dealt with a father being hauled away because he open handedly slapped his teenage daughter who defied him and demanded to stay out late at night. The Cops informed him that he could in NO WAY STRIKE HIS OWN CHILD.)
Teachers lost authority, lawsuits became gold mines, child rights went far overboard. (I also interestedly observed that these no-hit, pampered kids, when they grew up, became the very selfish CEO’s of the current corporations, and the employee became expendable, hostile takeovers sprang into being, professional corporate ax-men appeared, and people started increasing the price of a companies stocks for LAYING OFF 20,000 people. The 'I-got-Mine generation appeared – along with an increasing weight problem.)
Doctors did point out back then that too many kids were doing too little exercise and getting too fat. Instead of solidly fat kids in town, I observed the increase of sullen, pallid looking little buggers with flabby beer-bellies! Sorry people, but statistics prove me out.
There are naturally big boned and big people. Certain ethnic origins dictate heavier forms. Cool, but obese, unless medically or psychologically generated, in my opinion, is sloth. NO, I do not expect heavy people to starve themselves down to the current skinny standard and NO I do not agree with anorexic models of fashions.
When I was a kid, we used to see ‘southern fat’ i.e.: men and mainly women who were very fat with great rolls of fat sagging down their legs. As the diet changed from masses of thickening gravy, hush puppies, bacon grease as the universal flavoring, deep fried everything, consuming vast quantities of bread with each meal, and using lard, plus masses of fatback, this faded away. It is rarely seen now.
Most of the fat people I have known personally have a habit of little physical activity and consume great quantities of food each meal and not the diet stuff either. The last national medical report I happened to peruse stated very clearly that the medical profession has noted with concern the tendency of Americans to become over weight.
Insensitive me? Not really. Just stating a factual observation. (Why do you think dieting and liposuction have become major processes here in the States?)
Now, my apologies to all I will shortly offend, but after reading all of the interesting and hostile posts directed towards me, and as this IS the BBQ pit, I MUST respond in kind.
Kiss my not obese (but not skinny either) ass! If you friggin’ buggers care so little about yourselves to dress in ways to actually enhance your size, then BITE ME! From the remarkable response, I’d say your hostilities based on your own insecurities are showing.
Mark
“Think of it as Evolution in action.”
No point in commenting on his ridiculous drivel, but I just have to know…
Who moved the rock?
Zette
A friend is someone who likes you even though you’re as ugly as a hat full of assholes.
Zettecity
I admit it. See my previous thread re: tall, dark, muscular men.
>^,^<
KITTEN
Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point.
Diane, thank you for correcting me about Marilyn Monroe’s size.
Now, Mark, assuming you read Diane’s post, you’re calling MM’s size “an acceptable standard of heaviness”. So, someone who is a size 8, is acceptably “heavy” and someone Mimi’s size should be shunned by society. Should we throw rocks at them, too, just for fun?
Oh, fuck it. I’m tired of fighting with you! I’m going to go sit on my fat ass and eat bon bons, since that’s what you expect of me. Instead of going to the gym, like I usually do.
You know what? I’m a real potty mouth when I’m mad. I’m a real potty mouth when I’m excited. Let’s face it: I’m a real fucking potty mouth!
But I can understand your shock and anger at being called an asshole. Yes, I’ll even admit that I’m the one who started with the “blue” language by calling you an asshole. Since this, being called an asshole, is so objectionable to you I will refrain from ever calling you an asshole again.
How does sphincter face grab you?
My hostility is not based on insecurity. It is based on injustice. You have no right to tell me or anyone else what is “appropriate” to wear. You decide what you wear everyday, right? Let me and everyone else do the same.
I also might point out that your sig line needs an overhaul.
Best!
Byz
Hey Phil – that’s great! That you’re a man who apparently loves his wife for who she is, not what her body size is.
I’ll take the challenge.
My “dream” man, when I was single, was over six feet tall, with a full head of very dark hair, dark eyes, a sense of the romantic, a mysterious smile, and most definitely a non-smoker. I tend to be attracted to men who are taller than me, and who are not very slender, simply because I am tall and big boned and a BBW. I dated a few guys like that. The one I was engaged to for a while is the one who treated me the worst.
My husband, who is the father of my three children, is 5’8" tall, 148 pounds dripping wet, was starting to lose his light brown hair when we met, has hazel eyes and is a more-practical-than-romantic soul. He also smoked. (My family said they knew it was love when I married a man who smoked. He quit two years after my dad died, having seen the gunk they suctioned out of my dad’s lungs during his last weeks in the hospital.) Definitely TOTALLY opposite to my fantasies. We’ve been married, through good times and bad, for 15 years.
What attracts me to a man? Well, sure, on first sight I like the body type set forth above. But that’s only a small part of it. Give me an intelligent guy who can make me laugh, who has a nice smile and sense of humor, who has honor and integrity, who has some of the same interests I do as well as some of his own so we don’t get into a rut, and who has a kind heart, and then what color his hair is (if he has hair!) or how tall he is or how much he weighs or bench presses is really irrelevant.
Now maybe I learned this early on, since I’ve always been “the tallest kid in the class” and even when young was “chubby” sizes, so I took a lot of abuse, taunting, and rejection. Someone up above commented that treatment like that can make someone more compassionate toward those that don’t fit in. I know that if someone decides they don’t want to be involved with me romantically (or otherwise) because I’m big and tall, they’re missing out on a lot (past tense here!). That leads me to think that if I decide not to be involved with someone based on their looks, I could be missing out on a lot, too.
On the other hand, the one thing I have to say about Mark and the others here who have made their comments – I’m glad to know about that upfront. Clearly our values would never be compatible, and at least I wouldn’t be wasting my time thinking he’s a nice guy. Pity the woman who marries him at a time when she conforms to his ideal body type, and then, due to pregnancy or any other reason, gains weight.
Just my 2 cents, as it were.
-Melin
OK, I’m skinny: 5’7.5", 135 pounds. My wife has, over the just under 25 years we’ve been married, varied from 110 to 204 pounds, and she is only 5’3". And she has a slightly strange body makeup, in that at her skinniest, she had a small potbelly though her limbs were nearly gaunt. And I told her way back when she began gaining that I would never criticize her weight for the sake of appearance, but reserved the right to nag if it appeared to be affecting her health. I kept that promise until she passed 200 going up, began complaining of aches and such (in her mid-30s) and was a bit short of breath. Then I agitated at her to think about taking some weight off. And she did. She’s about 130 now, and looks as good as any 50-year-old woman without recourse to make-me-look-younger treatment possibly could. She carries her age regally, and is prettier to me now than when we married.
Personally, I like to look at slender people. But you know what? It ain’t my business why person X weighs 120 and person Y weighs 280 (unless they make it so). And I’d be much happier being friends with Byzzy or Ayesha, or Falcon for that matter, than ogling some beautiful 20-year-old that considers age a criminal offense and brains unnecessary if you have style.
Not addressed at any particular person, but if the shoe fits… The world wasn’t made for your pleasure. Other people have rights and feelings too, and the right to live their lives free of your judgment. {End of rant}
Yeah, and I am certain that it has NOTHING to do with the love obsession with our television sets, VCRs, and Nintendo games.
In the olden days, most of our childhood entertainment was physical. Kick the can, baseball, hopscotch, basketball, tag. We didn’t have the option to sit on our asses in front of the TV or computer games. (Not all of us considered PONG to be entertaining enough to sit for hours.)
Aside from Jiffy Pop and Cracker Jack, we didn’t have all of the fat-laden junk food like we do today.
>^,^<
KITTEN
Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point.
I can’t believe what I just read. Excuse me, Mr. Serlin, but just when was the post of Aesthetics Czar created?
I know that this is the BBQ Pit, but I am truly offended by your posts.
Sheesh…should we require people with ugly noses get rhinoplasty? Hire wardrobe consultants for the color blind? God forbid that we let people go out looking less than perfect.
And I still don’t get “no spanking = fat kids”.
Me and my siblings regularly got spanked and today my sister weighs 200+ pounds and I’m on my way.
Regarding the OP,I used to be very skinny, 5’10", 120 pounds and I used to get harassed about my weight all the time. I used to get really nervous eating in public because people would make comments about what I was eating.
Still, it wasn’t nearly as bad as what the larger girls get. I don’t know why people feel like they have the right to comment on other’s appearances. Making fun of a person’s weight (or nose, or eyes) is a cheap shot.
Sometimes I think I have an “excuse” for being fat, because of my disability. I haven’t been able to run or exercise since junior high (or middle school, whatever it’s called these days). I did have a job that helped me lose a lot of weight about 5 years ago, but I also lost a lot of muscle as a result and developed foot drop which makes walking difficult these days. I’m in the process of getting a wheelchair which will mean even less exercise. How much weight will I gain? I don’t know. I hope not a lot; I’ve consulted with a dietician, but diet without exercise doesn’t accomplish a lot.
Now, I think a lot of people, even those who enjoy making fat “jokes” (if that’s what bellowing MOOOOOOOOO at people you don’t know is supposed to be), wouldn’t dare make fun of a person’s disability. But people don’t always realize I’m disabled. If I’m just sitting around, there doesn’t look like there’s anything majorly wrong (if you ignore the fact that only one side of my face moves). Then the fat “jokes” (taunts and criticisms are more like it) really hurt.
Pain. Living like this is full of pain. Being told from the time you’re a young child that you are ugly, repulsive, and disgusting is very painful. Why do people have to inflict so much pain willfully? That’s what I don’t understand. Is that how they alleviate their own pain? By heaping it on others?
Below are some links to web sites that I’ve been visiting to try to alleviate my own pain. I hope everyone here finds them educational and/or entertaining. Entertaining in a good way, that is. If instead they just remind you of every fat joke you’ve ever heard, please try to show a little class.
http://www.radiancemagazine.com/radiance_magazine.htm
http://www.adiosbarbie.com/
http://www.bbwmagazine.com/
I hope these aren’t “spam,” I’m not trying to sell a product; these sites have plenty to explore and read without paying any money.
“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy
Just what sort of woman would even want to be with our pal, Mark? Seriously…what kind of women do you date/marry? I’m interested in hearing the “skinny” on that!
BTW, if you’re going to compare me to Mimi, all I can say is, “Bite me,doughboy.”
“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy
In response to Phil:
I’ll take that oath. I have, as a matter of fact. I know what I like to look at, but content is more important. I don’t like a lot of body hair, I don’t particularly find overweight men or bald men physically attractive…not right off the bat. Appearances don’t disqualify anyone, though.
From another thread, I know that you are “fuzzy”. If you and say, Brad Pitt, were both interested in me, I can honestly say I’d date you. You are smart, witty, sharp and clever. Brad Pitt (though rich and semi-talented) is eye-candy.
(*note: I used Brad Pitt because he’s a Hollywood pretty-boy that, it seems, every woman has drooled over. I’d like to point out that I do not personally find Brad Pitt attractive.)
MarkSerlin: You’re a prick, and I feel sorry for you. With your attitude, it’s very unlikely that you’ll ever have a meaningful relationship with anyone other than yourself.
“Excrement. That is what I think of J. Evans Pritchard, PhD.” --Robin Williams, Dead Poets Society
Chris’ Homepage: Domestic Bliss
Polycarp sez:
Oh really? Are you in political science by any chance?
http://www.spacemoose.com/strips/polisci.gif
And while I’m endearing myself to people I might as well post this example of a male getting crap for being fat:
http://www.spacemoose.com/strips/fritos.htm
http://www.spacemoose.com/strips/comin_through.gif
http://www.spacemoose.com/strips/deflab.gif
And if you want to post about how insensetive I am here’s my pre-emptive thumbs up and a smile! TU&S (see http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/000593.html )
