You’ll find me to be the least PC person on earth, webmastr. Intonation is another thing that comes into play here. Reread PharmBoys initial observation (using the term losely). How can I not interpret that as a slam?
Me neither. I just told him to watch his step. Everyone deserves a second chance. Although this was quite a serious mess-up.
If he wanted his opinion to be treated with respect, he should have worded it with respect. It’s as simple as that. This is not a debate about AIDS. His remark did not make it one either - it was far to inflamatory for that. As for his backpaddling second try: he should have thought of that earlier. Dixit.
Your opinion is noted. The beef was not the appropriateness of the forum, it was the apparent intent and intonation of PharmBoys first post.
I do have a question, however. I stress that I am not being judgemental here, I just want throw out a thought.
I was thinking that any straight guy (or gal, for that matter) that ‘boasted’ about his sexual activeness (multiple partners, in a very short time frame, by using chat rooms) would probably be met with posts roasting him for ‘being shallow’ and a slut. Not that this is or is not true; nor do I say that Espris is or is not a slut. My point is that I think a straight person posting a similiar type of message would not be met with so many non-critical posts.
I also note that many of the posts will give a ‘bastard’ and ‘you suck’ type opening, but then throw in a smiley face or whatever - is this out of the fear that they might be seen as critical of Esprix, and thus a homophobe?
Again - I don’t really know if this is true or not. But I just had the feeling reading the posts that maybe people are going out of their way (OK, maybe not out of their way - but I can’t think of any other way to say it) to not offend, or be perceived as offending, someone who is in the minority in terms of sexual preference. And I don’t think people would be so tolerant of straights basically saying there were only in for one-night stands (don’t know if that is what Esprix is saying, but it seems like that to me).
I am not a homophobe (at least I don’t think I am – some of my best friends are gay ) and I am NOT saying that Esprix should be criticized for living as he sees fit. I personally (as I mentioned above) worry about the potential risks, both to him and his partners, but that is not the focus behind my question here. I am merely asking if indeed there is a double standard of sorts at work that may prevent or shield minorities from criticism that would otherwise be directed at non-minorities. If so - is this acceptable?
ColdFire, if this is too much of a hijack, I can open a new thread on it. Thanks -
No, no, no - again. And I agree with scratch; no reason to feel sorry about the thread, regardless of your reasons for starting it. Look - my query was about people’s reaction to it, as opposed to a similiar thread started by a white male (for example) and if there would be difference.
I think I am sorry I posted to this thread, but for the record: Esprix, get a slightly thicker skin, because in no way was I blasting you. I have read many of your posts in a number of threads, and while I don’t think I would be interested in getting to know you in the biblical sense, I bet you are a blast to be around. (mundane point that probably only I find of interest: the most fun I have ever had was at a gay bar in San Antonio - my first and only time in San Antonio, but it was an absolute blast. Does that prove I am not a homophobe? No?). Your posts are a riot, and I love your sig. OK?
Yeah. What Oldscratch said. And if you’re ever in the North, do I ever have someone to introduce you to. If you could be induced to shower your god-like favours his way, I would grovel and worship at your feet. He’s been whining at me for three years . . .
As a desperately married woman, I envy your variety.
Um - I thought you did. Seeing as how your post was like right after mine and all. Honest mistake if I wasn’t the object of the post. Apologies for jumping to conclusions.
Well, leaving the pundits, nay-sayers, prudes, sexually repressed and hysteria-prone aside for a moment… where was I? Ah, yes, Vince. {sigh} What a hunk. But now you can add Willie to the list - wonderful beefy Navy boy. Yum!
And, believe it or not, I may actually have some real dates lined up for later this week - dinner, coffee, and no guarantee of gettin’ any! :eek:
But, of course, in my heart of hearts I’m saving myself for my second-favorite Canadian, matt. Oh, and, um, my favorite northern Californian Doobieous. Um, er, I mean oldscratch. But then again there are all those Dopers I’ve left behind on the east coast…
Aw hell. There just ain’t enough of me to go around - but we sure as hell can try!
Jesus Esprix. Be careful. No! Not about anything like that. I can trust you on that I think. But for God’s sake…make sure you’re drinking you Ginseng energy-boost tea and such. Healthy breakfasts every day…get a lot of fruits and such. No sense wearing yourself out. Remember! Endless sex is an endurance sport…not a sprint!
Call broker. Take strong positions in latex, vaseline, and body oil markets. Corner them if possible.
Really now. prudes, sexually repressed? Lets just poeple names who disagree with you young man.
A little defensive eh?
I can’t imagine why these posters are jealous of you.
Using people for their bodies, throwing them away afterwards, and also vice versa.
Why not just buy an inflatable toy?
Not jealous, not repressed, I feel sorry for you.
Vanilla, if you go out for coffee with someone, and then neither of you calls the other again, were you using each other for conversation?
If I go to bed with someone, and we both understand the nature of what’s going on, and we’re both getting the same thing out of it, how is that “using”?
It may not be the world’s deepest and most powerful and meaningful liaison, but not everyone in the world feels the need to exchange rings and sign a pre-nup before bumping uglies.
matt: good point. Maybe they all knew they were just fun for the moment in bed. You make sense.
If, however, any of them thought it might lead to something, it would be using.
But you are right.
Um, I think this was kind of the point Esprix was making.
Oh, and Matt, mon petit morceau de viande? Don’t keep chasing after Esprix now that he’s out on the left coast screwing everything but the crack of dawn. Instead, exchange a series of increasingly passionate letters with your ever-lovin’ Cheffie, and when I scrape up the money I’ll pack my spurs and head your way. wink
