1.I have lots of things I want to do with my extra time…but fitness is the biggest one. I also want to perhaps arrange less weekend music gigs for myself and begin a calmer chapter of life. I’m also going to take a class. What else should I do?
Any thoughts on when I should begin dating again? I think it’s probably best for me to move out and then…I honestly feel ready to look sooner than later.
Don’t jump into anything serious too quickly just because you’re lonely, but I don’t think you have to wait months to even start dating at all. No one ever does anyway, even if everyone thinks it’s best (generalization, obviously).
Generally that’s good advice but given that the OP has started three threads on this situation in less than two hours, he’s probably not ready for even that.
I don’t understand why people are looking for a replacement before they’ve washed off the cologne (perfume, if you were) of the last one. I think that is completely crazy, from the land of no sense.
I’ve come to live with the fact that I am in the minority.
Definitely move out first before you start dating. I went through something similar a little less than a year ago and the weirdness is still not totally dissipated. I would venture to say that you will find surprising ways that the two of you are still tied together for several months after this break up. It’s a lot for a new romantic prospect to swallow. I would say even casual encounters should wait until you’ve moved out, if for no other reason than to drastically reduce the risk of having more than one sexual partner at the same time, in case there is ‘breakup sex’.
I think for me the best advice has been to wait until I move out. Once we are completely separate, then I can begin looking. The new person then won’t feel awkward. So I guess two months is the answer for me!
One strategy is just pursue your interests and get out and do things. You will likely meet someone while you’re just out doing your thing. If you sit at home all the time of course that won’t likely happen.
I must be really confused, I go from wanting to go for another relationship, to becoming sad at random moments thinking about my old relationship.
Any advice for me here? I foolishly signed up for E-harmony, and found someone there who looks like a great match for me. I don’t want to lose the oppurtunity to meet her, but I wouldn’t want her in any way to deal with my emotional baggage. I guess I should just swallow the pain and wait right?
I really want to make sure my values and goals are straight and clear before I pursue someone new. It’s only fair to the next person. I have a theory that a person only attracts people who reflect themselves in some way. In my last relationship, I think we were both too accommodating.