YMOV?
You, me & Old Vienna?
Your mushy omelet Viking?
I don’t care if Zenster is the prince of darkness, the knife twisting for not appreciating his personality during encounters off the board lacks a certain class. This is a message board, not an intervention.
Thank you, Kyla, for your apology. What you posted was very hurtful, especially if reading your post would have been the first time Zenster discovered what you think of him.
I’m glad you saw the error of your actions and took the extra step to post to that effect.
I don’t know Zenster in person. But, some of you have and have really nice things to say and others have really bad things to say. He sounds… human. Not monstrous, not angelic, but like a pretty average guy.
I agree, heloise. My online experiences with him aside, I still think he sounds at the worst, human.
To respond to Arden Ranger’s curiosity as to why some would find Zenster’s gifts creepy, I have to admit I would find that creepy as well. If a poster I had never met and I had no real internet connection with, suddenly bought me or my family expensive gifts with no expectation of recompense, I would find that odd. I find that gifts of that nature often come with expectations or strings attached. I trust you, Arden Ranger, however, to have a grasp on what is kind and what is creepy. When you say he did it out of the milk of human kindness, I believe you.
If there were strings, I have yet to see them. He has been nothing but nice to me since then.
He wasn’t the only one that stepped up when they heard how truly bad things had gotten around here. Scotti sent gifts to both my kids for Christmas last year and I didn’t know her any better than I did Zenster and I think Scotti is about as far from creepy as anyone can get
We have a lot of “creepy” folks who helped out Polycarp during his recent financial troubles, then.
Arden Ranger, I think that’s fantastic that people showed you such wonderful kindness, and your vouch for him speaks loudly to me.
Ferret Herder, read my post more carefully. I trust Arden Ranger’s judgment, but as a teacher I’m constantly dealing with teenage girls who come to me with, “Miss, look at this necklace my thirty year old friend bought me…no, I don’t think he expects anything in return…” And the shit hits the fan from there. There’s nothing wrong with a healthy dose of skepticism, but if Arden Ranger says it was cool, then it was cool.
I’m about a hair’s breadth away from a cynic as anyone can get but seems to me there’s severe cognitive dissonance goin’ on between substance, appearance and conveniently distant board drivel.
Do I “know” Zenster? Never met him face to face, wouldn’t know him if I tripped over his feet. Haven’t always agreed w/ what he’s posted but he’s been a gent about it. Sometimes it’s taken a bit of back-and-forth to reach equilibrium but so it goes. I’m usually pretty veiled about what’s bothering me but Zenster has noticed and written me privately, just for good wishes. Nothing more, nothing oogy or or persistent, just offered.
On the grand scale of communication, IMO this rant rates a nod, nothing more or less, not dissection. Style doesn’t equal substance. Get a grip.
All in favor of slack,
Veb
Jesus Christ, everyone lay off. Zenster sounds just like my father and I’m sure he’s a great guy. This has gone way too far. Please chill out. 
Hey Arden, I have met Scotticher and her name and creepy don’t even belong in the same sentance! Very nice lady.
You’re right - there are people out there who do decent, kind, things just because. I’ll bet a lot more of it goes on among Doper’s than we ever hear about.
I don’t know Zenster well. Never met him IRL or spent much time on the same threads, but I’ve seen some things I liked. When Zen the puppy was so sick I happened on the thread and read it until I knew he’d be okay. Zenster so plainly cared about his pet that my heart went out to him and I’ve had a bit of a soft spot ever since. Yes, there have been times when he struck me as a bit, um, abrasive, but I’ll always know that he has a good heart.
As one of those who don’t care for the guy, I just want to say “of course he’s human.” I don’t think anybody is trying to say he is evil incarnate.
He’s just someone, where once exposed to him in person, we prefer it not happen again. He and I have had at it before, and I didn’t like him before meeting him (based purely on his board personality), liked him less after meeting him.
That said, he is a nice guy. As far as I can tell, he is sincere and means well. I’m sure others meet him and think he is the bee’s knees; and I’m fine with that.
I wouldn’t call him a fuckwit, but in my opinion he does suck the air out of any room (or thread) in which he’s found.
I’ve also seen way too much of his underwear for my tastes.
Tony Barber, if you’re going to link to another posters activity that caused you to rant, please don’t just link to the threads. It works better if you include the post id in the link, so the link goes straight to the offending post, that way we can see exactly what activity in the thread drew your ire. And some of us don’t really think it’s worth the effort to scan through the entire thread. You’re the Pitter, it’s your case to build, you need to make it easy for us to see what set you off.
Wow. I’ve seen some of the meanest posts I’ve ever read on the SDMB in this thread.
That makes me really sad.
I tend to agree with the OP on Zenster. I’ve come to dread most cooking threads because I know he’ll be there with his assumption that he’s the only person on the boards who has ever cooked anything other than a can of beans. I’d even venture to guess that there’s more than a few people on the SDMB that know more about certain aspects of cooking than Zenster does, but my impression of him is that he’d never acknowledge it.
I do hesitate to post here, though, because I don’t know him in real life, and he may be the nicest guy I’ve ever met. But it just doesn’t come through on the boards, IMO.
Oh, that’s simply not so. Many, many things have been said that are much meaner, vile, hateful, insipid, personal, and questionable.
Most of you suffer under the strange illusion, though, that a statement is somehow less those things if the subject isn’t a Doper. The things said in this thread would be no less mean or nice if they were about Tony neighbor.
This is awful.
Bitch about someone based on what they do on the boards. Don’t bitch about them based on what you know about them IRL. There’s something … very distasteful about that. We haven’t met him, some of the rest of you have. We can’t dispute what you’ve said about him IRL, and we feel somewhat at a disadvantage because of that.
You’ve divulged, well, while not quite “private” stuff about him, I’d say it is stuff that I didn’t really want to know, or need to know. Heavens–why should any of us want to attend a Dopefest, if we have to worry about the other Dopers spilling the beans about our personalities, our frailties, and whatnot? Yeesh!
Let me make up my own mind about Zenster, based on his behavior on this board. If I ever meet in IRL (and I may, on one of my many pilgrimages back to Calif.) I will make up my own mind about what he’s like IRL. So far, I like him on this board. He’s a bit hot-headed sometimes, but not so out of the ordinary. He’s A-OK in my book.
Ewww. This thread leaves me with an icky feeling.
Fair enough. I hereby call on everybody to stop saying nice things about people after Dopefests as well.
Let me make up my mind based solely on board personalities.
But if it makes things any better, I’m not saying he is any different in real life than on the boards. If you like him on the board, then I’m sure you’ll like him in real life. I didn’t like him on the board and was saddened to find that he is exactly the same in real life. He is one of the few people I’ve ever met who is exactly as they present themselves online.
So far, no-one has answered this very important question. 
Tony Barber is a former quiz show host. Brief (out-of-date) CV and photo:
http://www.marksonsparks.com/online/personalities/barber_tony.htm
Most of you won’t recognize my name, as I rarely post here, though I occasionally read many threads. Because I am an honest and moral person, I will also have to tell you that Zenster called me and asked me to read the posts in this thread and reply, if I felt comfortable doing so. I feel it is necessary to respond to these posts. I also feel it is my duty to use my real name, as this post ties in both personally and professionally. This will be a long one so feel free to skip by it, if you wish.
I first became aware of STMB—and Zenster-- in the fall of 2001. Two young men had tied cats to a railroad track in Saratoga, CA, doused them with gas and set them on fire. Zenster started a thread regarding the demise of the cats. One of the cats, Chubz, survived. Eventually, Chubz had to be humanely euthanized (put to sleep) because of the severity of his injuries. [See Straight Dope Message Board > The BBQ Pit > Warning: Explicit descriptions of animal abuse:May These Rat Bastards Fry In Hell ! (9-23-01…search the site by Chubz AND Fund to see thread)]
The agency I work for, Silicon Valley Animal Control Authority, received a donation from a woman in Kansas to help with the veterinary bills for Chubz, which had exceeded $5000. It was through her (“Baker”) that I ended up meeting Zenster, who lives in the same proximity of the cities in my jurisdiction.
If you go back and read the thread, you will see what a compassionate and genuine human being Zenster is, despite any and all of his faults. Something that sticks in my mind, from childhood through adulthood attending Sunday School:
“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone" (John 8:7)
First of all, to clear the issue, Zenster is definitely a male.
Secondly, the SDMB “Pits”, I thought, were to vent your opinions. For example, he was venting regarding his recently widowed neighbor who he believed was being mal-aligned by another neighbor. I didn’t see anywhere where he was asking for advise, although it is generally understood that even venting on the Boards requires a response.
Most of those speaking negatively about Zenster appear to be speaking “against” his opinion. Another quote, although I do not know the source, comes to mind (and I am paraphrasing): “Opinions are like ‘assholes’-everyone has one. And to everyone else, yours stinks”. Such may be the case with many of you and Zenster.
I have been in many social and private settings with Zenster. His bad points: Yes, he is opinionated. (Aren’t we all on things we are passionate about?) Yes he can be loud (although he is working on his “soft voice”). Yes he can be “brash”. Yes, he comes off as an “FFI” (Fucking Fountain of Information”). Yes, he is sometimes wrong, even though he does not think so. Yes he professes to be a great chef…and he is. Yes, he does occasionally think his opinion is the only one that counts. Yes, he can come off as “conceited” at times. Yes, he uses $20 words that even I do not always comprehend, most of which are adjectives.
All these traits, however, are found in the most brilliant people in history. Are they faults? Not to them. Do they offend people? If the offended person is not brilliant, probably.
I overlook his faults because there are so many wonderful, humanistic traits that Zenster possesses. He is a passionate, caring individual, especially in the cases where others are wronged. Examples include Chubz’ owners, the widow neighbor lady, always providing Easter Baskets and Christmas stockings to the two girls that live next door to him, even when he can’t afford to (I have been with him when he had bought items for same, even though he had lost his job).
He is a true friend to those that wish for him to be a friend. I cannot tell you the number of times he has called to inquire about the condition of my youngest sister who was 6.5 months pregnant and in a serious auto accident this past fall and the calls in the past six months regarding my nephew who was born 9 weeks premature as a result of the accident and has serious health complications.
I cannot tell you the number of times he has been my shoulder to cry on, despite the fact that he may have needed one after being laid-off in the “dot com failures” of the Silicon Valley.
I cannot tell you the number of times he has driven to my home to cook for me when I was ill, or “just because”. Even the simple dishes are wonderful, despite a previous posting.
Friends are friends through thick and thin. He doesn’t care that I have put on 50 pounds in the past 2 years due to a medical (and stressful) condition, or that I am occasionally an emotional wreck or that I smoke when he is in MY house. And I don’t care that he can be boisterous, opinionated and obnoxious at times. We overlook each other’s faults because that is what friends do.
You, on the threads, are not necessarily his friends. You only see the printed result of the wrath of his passion, disagreement or discern. I am sure you would not want to be judged by people with whom you do not share a personal relationship…”Do unto others……”
You have the option to exclude Zenster’s posts…I suggest you use that option if you feel a strong negativism toward him. Life is too short and blood pressures too high!
Since I have the floor, I would like to give you a follow-up to the burned cats in Saratoga, CA: My agency established a fund in Chubz’ name to provide veterinary care for animal victims of cruelty. Our fund is not large but we recently sent $750 (half of what we have) to help treat a Scottish Terrier who was also doused with gasoline/lighter fluid and set on fire in Sunnyvale, CA. “Lucky” (his real name), was badly burned but did survive. You can read the news articles and progress from the veterinary clinic at the following sites:
http://www.sbvs.com/luckie_fund.htm
http://www.svcn.com/archives/sunnyvalesun/20030115/sv-cover.shtml
For those of you who may wish to donate to the “Chubz Fund, please go to
http://www.svaca.com/ourservices.htm#cruelty
Thank you, in advance, for allowing me to take up your bandwidth.
Deborah Biggs
Aka AlohaAloha
Thanks Deborah, but I think Zenster, whatever his shortcomings, will come out of this thread the better person anyway. The behaviour of some of the posters here has been nothing short of fucking reprehensible, and I have never felt so humiliated-by-proxy as on reading it.
May they NEVER put a foot wrong, anywhere or anytime that might see their antics being regaled on a messageboard.
Take care, and tell Zenster that he is always welcome here.