I have never included guys I have given blow jobs to on my “list.” It is a sexual act, of couse, but sex to me is vaginal or anal penetration with a PENIS. I also do not count men who have only gone down on me. Disregard the fact that sometimes these actions lead to actual penile penetration – it doesn’t always.
On the other hand, I count every sexual act I have had with women to be actual sex. Lesbian sex can’t involve a dick, so you gotta count something
After conducting a VERY informal survey, I found that every girlfriend I have agrees with this, but most men disagree.
My question is, then: women, do you count every guy you’ve ever gone down but not fucked on on your list? If so why, or why not? And men, do you count every woman you’ve gotten a blow job from, and all the women you’ve gone down on – even the ones you didn’t actually fuck?
Of course, there is always the rule that you don’t have to count sex with people you met on vacation, musicians or bartenders. But that’s another thread
I have only had sex with one person, my fiance. BUt I have given head to more than him and likewise. No oral can’t be counted on the list. But it is definitly sexual relations.
besides you don’t lose your virginity to Oral, any who says otherwise has moral issues to deal with.
I have to agree with what has been posted so far. Oral sex is not sex, per se, it’s more foreplay than anything else. It falls under sexual relations.
Like it was said, I don’t think you can count people you’ve had/done oral sex with to be on your lists, unless you count eveyone you’ve made out with to be on your list too.
I think the way people view oral sex, and the weight they attach to it, is different with each generation. In my opinion, I’d still have my virginity intact after giving a blow job. My mother, however, disagrees. My grandmother won’t talk about any of it. I come from a long line of repression…
Teenagers today seem to look at oral sex pretty casually. At parties, conversations my friends have go something like, “Hey. Nice to meet you. Mind if I give you a blow job?” Occasionally, they bother to get the other person’s name first. None of those girls have ever had sex though, nor do they intend to any time soon. A higher value is placed upon losing their virginity, which would require vaginal penetration. Anal doesn’t count.
My mom goes into conniptions every time the subject is broached. To her, oral sex is the most intimate thing two people can ever do. Far, far beyond sex. Giving/Getting head takes away one’s virginity and then some.
Oral sex is penetration–of the mouth!
Here is where you draw the line. Can you get a disease from oral sex? If only ‘oral sex’ is involved in a sexual assault, is it considered rape? If so, then it has to be considered sex.
And by the way, if you say that anal sex is not sex, then there area lot of gays who are still virgins!!
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I can’t believe that someone intelligent enough to find and post to this message board would ask this question.
Oral sex. What is the second word? DUH!
What, should the world change to fit your loose interperetation of an act, rationalizing it to be just fooling around so that you can be happy? Hmmmmm?
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Well, it’s sex…of a sort.
I wouldn’t include it on a count of people I’d had sex with though, and I think this is true of most people.
Of course, this standard haas to be changed for gays–different anatomy combinations involved and all…
I’m not sure I can entirely agree with the idea that it’s “foreplay.” Although it can be used as such, oral sex typically leads to much more intense orgasms (on the part of either gender) than coitus.
So, I guess you can put me in the “oral sex is sex” category.
My guess most people probably just view it the way they want to. Men feel good if they have a “high number” so they will count a crowded bus ride as sex, and women generally feel better if they have a "small number’, cause they don’t want to feel like a slut. It a generalization, but like most other statistics, its used to support the conclusion you want.
As for me any specific act is in its own category depending on the details and consequences(i.e. if I had a kid who was sexually active I would be less annoyed about oral because there isn’t the chance of pregnancy, but I would still be unhappy), Oral sex is not equal to penetration, but they are both very sexual acts
I look at it this way. Would you be pissed if your SO was giving or receiving oral sex with someone else. Would your SO be pissed if you were. If you answer yes then it’s sex.
Look at it this way… would you be pissed off if your SO was kissing some other person? If you answer yes, then it’s sex. Errrr wait a minute. Kissing is sex?
Hey Lanna, how can I get invited to these parties?
According to the OP, most women don’t think blow jobs are sex but men do. Guys, why are we arguing? Let the women have this one, I say! I, for one, am completely willing to have as many of Lanna’s friends NOT have sex with me in their fashion as I can handle.
I had a conversation on this topic once, and realized I really hadn’t thought about it. I guess I think it IS sex, of a sort. I know if my SO gave someone else head I’d consider it cheating. I also know that I would go down on a woman I liked, but only penetrate a woman I loved.
