Start my car without a key
So the Big Bang didn’t start it all?
Yeah, but I’m tired of waiting for the next Big Bang so I can drive to the supermarket. 
D’oh!! A deer!
I’m going to have to bring her in, aren’t I?
I wouldn’t recommend it. They don’t make good house pets. Plus, the price of Deer Chow[sup]®[/sup] and Cervine Diet[sup]®[/sup] have really gone through the roof lately.
**
Are there winter socks that actually work to keep your feet warm?
Considering getting a dog**
And then train him to lie on your feet!
We send an unmanned probe to Alpha Centauri. How do we control it when it’s there?
Ball bearings vs car battery
I think the car battery would have a better chance.
** Song sung by fans near end of English football matches
How can there be a glut of oil on the international markets atm?**
I assume they’re fans of that team with “Fly Emirates” plastered on their uniforms.
Things that don’t bother you, but seem to bother everyone else
Losing the “essential” employee at work
What’s one more employee more or less?
D’oh!! A deer!
It is raining
A drop of golden sun
**Can Venice Be Saved?
Will Planet Earth ever be solid?
**
If it is, Venice will be saved
Considering getting a dog
How creepy was this?
A dog??? Euggghhhhh!!! :eek:
Things that don’t bother you, but seem to bother everyone else
My pet rats
:eek:Keep those things in their frikkin’ cage, willya!
Should you expect to know what genitals a person has before a first date?
Is ma’am offensive?
It could be, if you haven’t asked what genitals they have first.
My pet rats
D’oh!! A deer!
You mean “deerrat.”
I think American society runs on poor choices
Considering getting a dog
You mean a Great Dane when you have a studio apartment?:dubious:
Is ma’am offensive?
Considering getting a dog
Just don’t call her a “bitch” in polite company.
Share your favorite classic funny threads!
Mass Killings in the United States 2019
Yeah, that was good for lots of giggles.
** “Deceptive” Product Names
Religious Literacy**
You cannot be religious and literate?
**Poll: Your Preferred Method For Getting High On THC
I think American society runs on poor choices**
How to best be on the lam?
What would it take for you to take up violent/semi-violent action against a government?
I don’t want no trouble. But if they surround my hideout, them cops ain’t taking me alive!
** New Nick Cage movie, starring Nick Cage as Nick Cage
Again with the annoying commercials!**
Yes, that’s right. Nic Cage stars as Nic Cage in this new Nic Cage movie. Could it be any more annoying?
** Considering getting a dog
What would it take for you to take up violent/semi-violent action against a government?**
Pooper-scooper laws violate my freedom! To the barricades!!! :mad:
Movies With No Love Interests
They Gave it a Happy Ending! (Spoilers, naturally)
The movie had been very lonely, so it’s only natural.