IIMCLILMW, something that’s not too expensive, unpretentious and doesn’t leave a bitter taste in my mouth.
Oh! I think I’m getting the point of this game! 
Mmmmmmmm. How about hot and strong, sweet and then drizzled with cream?
:::::slurp:::::
I like my <caffeinated beverage> like I like my women: black and thick.
[sub]…or hot and spicy. Or bubbly and amusing. Or golden-brown and smooth. Or sweet and Green. Or tall and with an Eastern European accent. Or passionate and Italian. Or friendly and English. Or…[/sub]
ILMCLILMW–
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50 cents a serving
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with a little head
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with something waterproof underneath
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in a hottub
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with jelly
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and a donut, for that metter
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with cream stirred in vigorously
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spread all over a naked woman
I like my women like I like my cup of coffee: dark, hot and bottomless.
I like my men like I like my coffee: from the rural fields of Colombia, making it in America withOUT having sold out to ruthless multinational corporations!
ILMCLILMM - straight. 
(Actually, I like my coffee dark and sweet, but I thought “straight” was funnier. I’m suck a dork. )
Mmmm you got it, Yersinia! 
…freshly plucked out of some third world country
and delivered to my kitchen overnight.
I like my coffee like I like my men: steaming hot, thoroughly sweet and French-roasted.
ILMCLILMW … hot and at work.
The canonical reply is:
“I like my women like I like my whiskey, pale blonde and 12 years old”
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Strong and bitter…
Or… I like my wine like I like my women.
Locked in the cellar.
I like my coffee like I like my women: Irish.
I like my men like I like my coffee: never.
I like my coffee like I like my women… cheap, fast, and free on the second helping.
I like my women like I like my coffee - reheated on high for 1:30.
I like my women like I like my scotch. Smooth and over 18.
IIMCLILM Tan, rich, and warm enough to chug.
I like my men like I like my coffee: Reheated or zombies!
SOMEONE had to post it!