Hey all, just needing to talk to someone and get this all out. If anyone remembers from my last thread I got dumped by my fiance who had a gambling problem. And we still live together.
I am working frantically to find another place to live. But I have found out some more things that have me disturbed and hurt.
I discovered that he had a secret email address and that he has been on dating sites. He also had told a friend of his that he was “hoping for a piece of ass” on Friday. He did not returned home until late last night and I confronted him on all of this.
It got bad. I completely lost my temper. I said some very horrible and hateful things to him. I got so mad that I shoved him to the ground. I ordered him to sleep in the living room and stay away from me. He is in the emergency services field and I told him to stop pretending to be a hero because he didn’t save lives, he destroyed them.
Today, when I came home from work, he was gone. His things are still here but he backs his suitcase and took his toiletries and some clothing.
I don’t accurately know how to explain how I feel anymore. I am so angry to find that he is on dating sites not even two weeks after he was engaged to me. I am very offended that he is telling someone that he is trying to get a “piece of ass” while he still lives with me. I deserve to be treated with some courtesy here!
I am also angry with myself! How is it that I was engaged to someone that I didn’t even know! I am really need to get the hell out of this house. I have no idea if he is paying any bills or not. I don’t know if our electricity is going to get shut down at any time.
I am going to look at a house for rent tomorrow and an apartment on Monday, that I can easily afford to pay rent on, but I do not have the security deposit required. I am planning to beg the landlord if I think it can work for me and my daughter.
I am so scared anymore. My anxiety level is super high. I do not feel safe. And I have no where to go and no way to get the money for the house that I am looking at tomorrow.
I need some good vibes, prayers, words and thoughts of strength for me and my daughter. And any ideas that you may have that could be helpful in helping me find my way out. I will be going to church for the first time in years to pray.