In the middle of a math lecture, the boards filled with equations, the professor is saying: “Now, from this it is obvious that the derivative of f(x) must always be strictly less than e…” when a student interrupts: “Excuse me professor, but is it obvious?”.
The professor stops and turns to look at the board. He stares at it for fully five minutes, silent except for the occasional “Hmm”. He then spends another five minutes pacing up and down holding his chin. Finally, he says “Yes! It is obvious” and continues the lecture where he left off.
(I attended many lectures that felt like that. After failing my first year, I switched to philosophy!)
A couple were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, says she’ll see him later and walks away. His wife glares at him and asks, “Who the hell was that?”
The husband answers “Oh, she’s my mistress.”
The wife angrily says, “Well, that’s the last straw, I’ve had enough, and I want a divorce.”
He replies, “I can understand that but remember, if we get a divorce it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Rolls Royce’s and Ferrari’s in the garage, and no more yacht club. But the decision is yours.”
Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm and the wife asks, “Who’s that woman with Jim?”
My son was just born and another dad at the nursery congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday he then chuckled and said maybe they’ll marry each other.
I’m like yeah, right, my son is going to marry someone twice his age.
