More Jokes

Yeah, not gonna lie, a bit of a thinker-- took me a minute. Nice payoff tho
:clap: :clap: :clap:

I just went to the annangram anagram finder and oceanic seems to be the only one.

I love anagrams. Especially anagram magic square.

Everyone else kept talkin’ about it, so my “stubborn” kicked in.

Got it.

Eventually.

Man, that was a lotta work, even with the hints.

Reminds me a bit of this one:

A man grows cranberries. He has so many, he starts selling them. People love his cranberries, business booms. He decides to incorporate and scale his business. He hires an assistant.

All is going well, but he is struggling to come up with a name for his company. His assistant tells him to just use his own name. The boss, being humble, resist this.

“Maybe I could use my name,” he says, “but code it somehow. Perhaps another language, like Swahili, Aramaic, Sanskrit, Pig Latin…”

“That’s a great idea, Mr. Sprocean!”

I threw a boomerang at a ghost and it came back to haunt me.

TIL: A thousand years ago, the boomerang was Australia’s chief export…

…And import.


How do you stop a dog barking in July?

Shoot him in June.


When I die I want to come back as a spider,

That way I’ll finally hear girls say “OMG, it’s huge”.


A plane carrying picnic baskets has crashed in the jungle -

Rescue attempts are being hampered.


When two metalheads marry…

…It’s called a welding.

Roy: “Hey, I heard a new Phoebe Bridger song!”

Laura: “Aren’t they all?”

Right over my head, not even mussing my hair.

I didn’t even need to duck.

mmm

I think it’s an inside joke.

As in, it only makes sense and / or is funny inside Gatopescado’s head :smiley:

I think the idea is that, for old folks like most of us, ANY song by a Gen Z (or perhaps even Millenial) artist is “new.”

My guess was that it was a dig at the singer, being so bad that any rendition of the same song will sound different from the ones before. I have no knowledge of her at all though.

Not Rob and Laura?

Let me explain… (I think she’s great, by the way)…

It seems like every time I hear something new lately (listening to new Sirius channels), she is somehow involved. She’s got like 4 bands, 12 side-projects, collaborates with everyone, produces, has her own label…

So, the (poor) joke is… Yes, every new song is hers.

Try:

Roy: “Hey, I heard a new song. It was by Phoebe Bridger!”

Laura: “Aren’t they all?”

And I’m not likely to hear any of them unless Weird Al does a take-off.

I’m sorry to say that yesterday I was convicted of stealing all the periods from the courthouse computers. I’m expecting a long sentence.

Wouldn’t that leave it open to question?

I was walking past a farm and a sign said:

“Duck, Eggs”

I thought: That’s an unnecessary comma - and then it hit me."


Punctuation can really change a sentence. For example, “Let’s eat kids” becomes

“Let’s eat punctuation.”


What do you call it when a physician corrects your punctuation?

A medically induced comma.


I recently won a punctuation competition.

My prize was an apos-trophy.


Why did Punctuation ruin Santa’s marriage?

Because a comma separates two clauses.