My nose was slashed (the outside) kind of badly last night by my nosering while we were getting busy. It’s the first time my nosering has attacked me like that. I didn’t call a halt, I’m proud to say, as it was already getting near the finish. I only caught the blood in my hand and waited until it was all over.
And everyone involved still had a good time. 
This is always a fun thread, methinks, so let’s hear some stories! Tell me about funny, or painful, or amusing incidents during sex.
Am I the only person that started to read the OP and wonder what nosering was? I worried that there was some new slang I didn’t know and I was going to look like a fool if I was making love and my partner asked me to noser her and I had no idea what to do.
Hmmm. Well, there are really two incidents I can think of.
#1: Making love with a guy I was dating fairly seriously. We were moving around quite a bit, and when we rolled over at one point I just about fell off the bed (he caught me.) Without missing a beat, somehow, I manage to say “Is that a design problem or a launch problem?” (From Real Genius for those who are unfamiliar.) He started laughing so hard I’m not sure we finished, but it seemed appropriate at the time. 
#2: I’ve been known to dabble in the BDSM scene…ok, dabble is a little weak. Anyway, I was at the house of a couple I knew, and it was the first time we’d really played together. He had me bound & was working on his wife…when suddenly his CD changer moved from Enigma (mood music) to…bluegrass. I like bluegrass, but it’s a little hard to keep focus when all of a sudden banjos start playing. :eek:
There was the time my daughter walked in on my ex-husband & I, but I seem to recall covering that pretty well. I don’t think we were at a stage of being particularly enthusiastic yet, so it wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been. IIRC it killed the mood, though.
Next?
I had a bed with a bookshelf headboard at the time of this incident; it was a Sunday. The day before, we’d been to the Rennaissance Festival, and I bought this huge ceramic goblet. Well, on Sunday, I told my SO I was pregnant, and (shock!) it turned him on big time! He immediately went to work on me, ignoring the fact that the ceramic goblet was on the headboard. We were getting pretty enthusiastic when the goblet crashed down on our heads, splashing Diet Coke all over both of us! But we were so wound up, we just moved to the bed in the spare room across the hall. We worried about the mess in our bed later.
I suppose I’ve got a few.
In Akron, where I grew up, there are a bunch of nice parks around which are very convenient for, uh, “parking” once the sun sets. Of course the parks department sends a guy out from time to time to roust the teenagers. One night I was going down on my gf in the back seat of my Cutlass Sierra at Treaty Line Park when she noticed headlights of a car pulling into the lot. In what seemed to be less than a tenth of a second she had wriggled out from under me, lept like a ballerina from the back passenger seat to the driver’s seat, landed in a perfect driving position, turned on the ignition, shifted into gear and started to drive away. Which was great, but we then had to find another inconspicuous place to park so that she could recover her pants and underwear and so we could change drivers. (She was 16 – she might not even have had her license yet.)
A short time later, same girl, same Cutlass Sierra, this time parked on the street outside her house, 2:17 AM. Because the SAT achievement tests were the next day/that morning, my curfew had been 9:00 PM. Whoops. The girl in question and I were engaged in various activities in the front seat (the gearshift was on the steering column, so it was actually quite roomy). Because it was chilly (Northeast Ohio in December! 2:17 AM!) we had put most of our clothes back on and were just pushing them out of the way as necessary. Then we see headlights pull past and park in front of us. Eep! So we both freeze like rabbits. We hear someone moving around outside. We sit up. There’s a tapping on the (fogged up) window. Yep, it’s my dad.
Me: Well, you got us.
Girlfriend (thinking very quickly): We must have fallen asleep!
Me: Uh, yeah.
Dad: Well, Alex, you’ve got the SAT’s in six hours. You should come on home.
Me: Uh, yeah.
That’s why my “most embarassing moment” in my high school yearbook was “12/03/90, 2:17 AM – Hi dad!” (Her most embarassing moment was “12/03/90, 2:17 AM – Hi Mr. [Cliffy’s last name]!”)
A year later, this time with a different girl (the future Mrs. Cliffy, as it happens). We skip class to go back to her room and fuck. (Man, college was cool.) Walking back across the quad some bank was doing a promotion that, for whatever reason, occasioned them handing out plastic hawaiian leis so we took one. Then we headed down the hill, got to her dorm, and got down to business. After an enjoyable time was had by all we put our clothes back on but are still lying there, post-coital, when the gf’s roomate, Ellen, enters unexpectedly.
Ellen: Hey, who got laid?
Us: Wh-wh-what?
Ellen (pointing): Where’d you get this lei?
Us: :smack:
–Cliffy
Uh, some clarification here – at the time, I was just two months past my 17th birthday.
–Cliffy
Nope, took me a couple re-reads to comprehend too. Kinda disappointing.
GT
Well, duh. That’s why this is called “more” - because that thread is too old to add to.
A nosering is simply a piercing through the nose. What did you guys think it was? Sorry so disapointing.
Ah! You mean a nose ring? I was getting all confused, too. Thought I had missed out on some kind of new rhinophilic fetish.
Hmmm…Does foreplay count?
My wife once was putting on a little show for me in bed while on our yearly anniversary trip. She stood up on the bed while I was laying there and started doing her thing. When she went to rip her shirt off wildly, she threw her arms up in the air…right into the ceiling fan!
Luckily she was alright, and we were able to laugh our asses off about the incident.
I believe they were reading it as “noser-ing” rather than “nose-ring”…that’s how I read it, anyway. 
Some of us are quite content to engage in some occasional nosery, thank you very much.
I hear the Eskimo are very fond of nosery.
Since I have a room mate that often has his GF over along with her boy (6yo); My lady friend and I don’t very often get the chance to be vocal durring our sessions. Which is something she absolutely LOVES to do.
So the other day we came home in the middle of the afternoon, only to discover to our delite, that we had the whole place to ourselves. So we go to my room shut the door and start going at it. SHE then starts to get very vocal.
Now, when I say vocal; not only does she like to moan very loudly but she also likes to talk dirty. So dirty in fact that I’m not going to repeat what she says here on this PG-13 website.
Well, as you may have guessed, they came home durring our session; only we were too involved to even notice.
After we finished it was only then that I realized that they had came home. I immediately came out of the bedroom to see what the deal was. I asked the mother: “Why didn’t you knock on the door to tell us to sut the hell up?” she was like “I didn’t want to be rude”
Meanwhile, I’m looking at the kid and he’s got a shit-eat’n grin on his face from ear to ear.
Oh well. Live and learn and all that.
About a month ago… hubby and I were going at it in the bedroom. The two cats were asleep in the livingroom when we’d started there (we got an occasional one-eyed glare from them if we got too loud for their liking). So we’re happily going at in the bedroom… eventually it ends up with me on the bottom and hubby on top - good old fashioned missionary-style to catch our breath in between. Suddenly hubby gets a weird look on his face. Between breaths, he’s sputtering:
“God… damn…”
“What honey?”
“God… damn… damn…”
“Sweetie? Are you going to come?”
he shakes his head
“God…damn… CAT!”
I lift my head and peek over his shoulder. Sure enough, there’s our oldest girl, Bastian, standing on her hind legs between my hubby’s legs, a paw on each of his asscheeks, and her little head bobbing up and down with each thrust. Her eyes were wide and curious, but not frightened. If she could talk, she looked like she would say “Whatcha doing? Hey, guys, what’s going on?” The sight was so ridiculous I just collapsed into laughter.
I only regret that Mr. Stasaeon couldn’t see it. All he knew was that there was a cat between his legs, groping his ass. He wasn’t too happy. Made my day, though. 
FWIW, you can tell him it just made my day, too.
But not too old to enjoy if one has never read it before.
If I had thought that this topic had been discussed exhaustively, I would have said so. I have never made any friends by being defensive. Perhaps it works better for you.
Way back in the dark ages when we were newlyweds, DeHusband and I had sex just about anywhere in the house. Including the step-down into the sunken den. Well, one time, we’d gotten busy and forgot to let the dog out. Ya know, there’s just something about a really cold, wet dog-nose contacting a swinging scrotum that really puts a damper on a guy’s libido. Never did it in the den again. And now the dog is strictly an outdoor dog.
Oh, stop being so sensitive. I was being light-hearted. Do I really need to put a smiley behind everything?
I love this.