I liked the “fish got legs!” panel and Death’s greeting to Tyler, but that was about it. Needs more Possum Demon.
It’s good to see a HAW HAW again.
I like how Jesus is like “I’m sorry, but I did everything I could think of to let you know I’m your savior. You have to burn now.”
Yes, the only think you could think of was a book that’s self contradictory and the message cannot be confirmed or investigated in any way until you die. Jesus is fucking retarded.
I had actually stopped paying attention to new Chick tracts because the quality (okay hilarity) seemed to have taken a severe nosedive in recent years. This one, however, was a true return to form. The picture of the vampire bat/dog/whatever thing on the 7th page is a nice touch.
[THIS IS AN ASS SANDWICH
IT IS MADE OF ASS AND POO](Yahoo | Mail, Weather, Search, Politics, News, Finance, Sports & Videos)
That’s Chickie Boy’s dog Fang. Or is it Spike? I always look for him in Chickie tracks. He’s my favorite!
Oh and those Chick You Tubes… thanks a heap! I’ll be up half the night now. 
Sure, but here Death says it as part of a longer intro…“Hi there…we have an appointment to make, Charlie Connors.” Which in my mind sounds like it’s being said in a deep, disturbing voice like an action hero, saying “Hi there” sarcastically. Just saying “Hi there” makes it sound like he wants to be your friend.
Oh my. This is hilarious. You guys do a good job. I love Jesus saying “As you can see, I like to quote myself and damn people to Hell who have a problem with that.”
Another Chick staple: The Jewish-looking devil. Speaking of the master race :dubious:
I swear that half the devils in these pamphlets couldn’t come across as more Jewish if they gave the poor hellbound bastards a blintz and advised them on IRA’s. Did Chick’s last job involve painting tattoos on Russian gangsters or something?
I imagine it like the very beginning of Peter Gabriel’s “Big Time.”
This tract seems to have some problems in the accuracy department. Since when did Jesus invent the Ten Commandments, for example?
I hear there may be some other factual errors as well.
This is great, my favorite still has to be this one though:
I love how the kid just completely randomly decides to give this guy a ride, and then listens to a guy he just met about being able to beat a speeding train. And how the guy killed (or got him killed) him in the middle of considering his options.
Remember kids, a speeding train could hit you any second, never doubt God, you may croak in the meantime.
You know, maybe that kid belongs in hell, he just broke Stranger Danger and “Don’t Be an Idiot” laws of the universe.
I’m not a bibilical scholar, but the opening of the Gospel of John says that Jesus was the word of God, or logos, made into flesh:
And since the concept of the Holy Trinity states that God the Father (YHWH) and Jesus are in effect the same person, it could be said that Jesus gave us the Ten Commandments.
Awesome tract. as others have said, a true return to form after a couple of lackluster efforts. Chick does seem to follow trends, though. Remember when he started doing gory Jesus after TPotC came out?
My favorite part of any Chick tract is someone says something like “Jesus? I’ve never heard of him! He died for my sins you say?”
Evolution? When the mother told the boy “In the beginning we came from goo” in the first panel, I figured Jack was going to go after sex education.
But I think we should all take away the good message from this work: following Darwin would have us persecuting other people because they belong to the “wrong” race. So we should follow the Bible instead, which would teach us not to judge people by the color of their skin - other people should instead be persecuted because they belong to the wrong religion.
I imagine it like it’s from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy: “Hi there! This is Eddie, your shipboard computer!”
AB-?
Who would have thought Chick would borrow a tract title from the Jeffersons?
Brilliant. Absolutely BRILLIANT. The “Wheeeee” totally sold it.
I mean, the thing actually made SENSE until he got to the “Master race” bit and then you totally have to wonder what the dude was smokin’… I have a strong suspicion it’s his bedroom carpet, but man, it’s gotta be some strong shit.
Glorious. Absolutely glorious.
Monday, in the middle of the video conference meeting for one of the shows I write for, I am TOTALLY going to shout, at an absolutely random point: “Since there is NO GOD, I am a god! I’ll decide what’s right and wrong! I am the god of my universe!” and see what my fellow scribes do and say.
(Glorious, I tell you.)
It never occurred to me to wonder before, but when someone says something like “Jesus? I’ve never heard of him!”, why aren’t they also saying “Sin? What’s that mean?”
The site I’ve been promising to give link to is
http://ChickComics.com
I’ve referred to it in previous Chick flame threads.
There are many features that are relevant and entertaining. Not only does Kurt link to all extant tracts, he also shows version changes over the years. (Many of the tracts with copyright dates over the past decade or two are actually revisions of tracts from the 60’s, 70’s, or early 80’s. Chick himself never refers to any original or intermediate dates.) There is also a section showing the page-numbering convention he uses, and which I also use. The key point is that the cover counts as page one.
But what you want to check out is “6 Degrees of Chick” by scrolling down the side bar to it. It’s right where it would be if “6” were spelled out. Or you can control-F page search down to it. I’d provide a direct link, but Kurt doesn’t seem to have anchors for particular parts of his site.
Brief quote from it:
Example #2: Taxes.
1st degree: Taxes are collected by governments to pay for goods in services.
2nd degree: One of the most important and biggest expenses of all local governments is education.
3rd degree: Modern schools have been infiltrated and taken over by liberals who brain wash our children into believing Evolution instead of Genesis, as exposed in the Chick tract, BIG DADDY.
TBJ