I’m going to engage in some severe crassness and nastiness here because you don’t want to listen to what anyone else says, and I’m tired of seeing you wrap yourself up in cuddly bullshit to keep reality out.
Your girlfriend lies to you regularly and sucks cock in bathrooms.
SHE IS A LYING, DIRTY SLUT WHO DOES NOT LOVE YOU. IF SHE LOVED YOU, SHE WOULD TELL YOU THE TRUTH ABOUT IMPORTANT THINGS AND NOT SUCK OTHER MEN’S COCKS.
Even if it turns out that she’s actually been raped (and, in this woman’s particular case, the mere fact that she has tearfully said so isn’t really even a reason to suspect this to be true), the above statement holds true, based on her past behavior.
Ditch the bitch. Now. You can’t help her unless she wants to stop being a lying slut, and that’s a decision she’ll have to make on her own. Without you, the enabling, gullible idiot.
Find a woman who loves you (i.e. someone who is not a lying slut, like the one you’re with) or be alone for a while (which, while possibly lonely, will reduce the amount of pain that the lying slut can inflict on you.)
(emphasis mine)And here, in a nutshell, is why this is a lost cause. Being a doormat for a pretty girl is such a cliche it’s not even funny. It’s just sad. I mean, you cite your insecurity as an excuse for her cheating! Why not just tattoo “Loser” on your forehead and be done with it? Sheesh.**
And here is the martyr syndrome in full force. “How can I think about myself when she has been through so much?”
As someone who stuck out a bad relationship for way too long out of a misplaced sense of nobility and obligation, I know that nothing anyone says here is going to have the slightest effect on you. You are going to continue to look for things that will allow you to believe what you want to believe, and explain away anything that contradicts it. Because fundamentally, you’re scared that if you break up with this girl, you’ll never meet anyone as pretty who likes you. And you imagine her with someone else in her life instead of you, and it makes you jealous and crazy, even though on a day to day basis you aren’t happy.
All I can tell you is that, deep down, you know when something isn’t right. Don’t squelch that feeling, listen to it. In a bad relationship, it keeps coming back. Eventually, you’ll learn to listen and do what’s best for you, even if it’s hard and painful.
Yeah, while these guys look straight past the average looking but not drop dead gorgeous women (like me!) who would treat them like gold, we have a hard time getting a date because we’re good-hearted but not pretty enough.
Course, it seems that either this is a really bad episode of some show hosted by Jerry Springer, or this dude is lying.
I really don’t think he’s lying, at least not about the key details. It’s hard to believe that someone could honestly believe the fucked up shit he’s saying, but I can tell you for a fact that it’s possible. People like Mr_Friendly’s girlfriend are very good at fucking with your head.
I’m with catsix. Her behavior (if this whole story is true) seems inconsistant to the behavior of rape victims I’ve known. I’m willing to wager that your girl"friend" is full of shit. Even if she isn’t, get the fuck out of this situation. I don’t get the feeling you want to, but the best thing you can do for yourself is to leave. Get her some counseling or whatever, if it makes you feel better, but you have no happy future with her. That I’d stake my life on.
I don’t think that Mr_F is going to do anything. This is the 3rd multi page thread about the same thing. All 3 threads are full of people saying ,rightly IMO, drop this crap out of your life. It hasn’t happened yet. Frankly, I don’t know what it will take for Mr_F to realize that he needs out, but I’m guessing it is going to be something very, very bad.
Mr_Friendly, when I saw this thread title (namely the bit about this being part 3), I had an immediate opinion, without even reading your OP or this thread, let alone parts one and two. I mean if a guy writes three seperate threads about how vile his girlfriend is, there’s clearly a problem, and it’s not with her. But I figured it’s not right to have an opinion without data, so I’ve read all of the above. And (surprise!) my opinion is no different:
You’ve made a big mistake, and you keep digging deeper. And frankly, I don’t know why I’m posting this, as you’re clearly going to keep digging.
And you know what? Rape is a horrible horrible thing, but even if she was raped (and I’m extremely doubtful), it’s her problem. She’s done nothing to deserve your friendship or support. You’ve given more than she deserved. You shouldn’t feel good about her problem obviously, but at the same time you don’t owe her to make her life better. And in fact quite the opposite. She owes you.
Walk away.
I’ve got a dollar here that says we’ll be seeing a part 4 sooner or later.
Dude, this is the THIRD thread about all this BS and its getting more and more like an episode of Days of our Lives.
I’m going to do like Coin and give you an opinion which is utterly nasty and harsh. Fingers crossed that you might actually listen.
If she was raped, it’s her problem. She has to deal with it. Stop trying to be a fucking hero and get yourself outta there! She doesn’t love you! People can say it, words don’t mean shit. It’s showing someone that counts. And giving some random dude head in a toilet isn’t love. So she’s pretty. SO FUCKING WHAT! That has got to be one of the most ridiculous things I’ve heard in a long time. “Oh, she cheats on me and drinks and is a liar but she’s pretty so I’ll deal with it, because she loves me.” Get a fucking grip!
If you don’t get yourself out, and dont listen to the good advice given here (and elsewhere, I’m sure), then you fucking deal with the pain and emotional upset that you’re inflicting on yourself. Don’t make out that you’re so amazing and selfless, when it’s really just you being shallow, afraid that no “pretty” girl will ever “love” you again.
FWIW, she sounds like an absolutely ugly person on the inside. Her being raped does not cancel out everything she did to you in the past.
And I’ll see your dollar, Bill H. and raise you two.
i)I am not making any of this up, I cannot be bothered with such things. When I wish to use the internet in such a way I wind up racists and bigots not the intelligent people who populate these boards. I posted originally out of a sense of frustration with the situation, I didnt feel I could talk to anyone and I just wanted to rant about it, I never expected the response I got and since then I’ve just made subsequent posts for broadly similar reasons (to get things off my chest) but also to inform the teeming millions of the ongoing situation. To anyone who says Im making this up I have only two things to say, firstly you sadden me by making such a hurtful implication when this is a pain I face daily and secondly, you’re wrong.
ii)I have made three posts about this girl. three. she has been in my life for almost a year and a half in different faculties but always as important in some way, I have been through my first year of university which has been themost amazing and significant year of my life thus far with her. I cannot explain to you all the way I feel about her and her about me. When I read the comments telling me to dumpher I feel you are probably right. i feel that way when I go to bed on my own, drunk and depressed form a day of missed lectures and upset feelings but when I am with her nothing else matters. I saw her fo rthe first time after finding this out on saturdya and made it very clear what must happen. Things must change, she cannot forget this for her own sake or for mine and it was one of the best times we’ve spent together. i do not know what will happen in our relationship from now on and that I break up with her often seems inevitable but I cant say for sure. I’ve now set an arbitrary deadline of the christmas holidays for deciding what to do, if things are not good enough by then to justify it then I will probably end the relationship.
iii)There is no third point except that I thank you for all your input whatever nature it was and ask that this thread now be closed pending further events. Any questions or comments on the matter are welome via email and I would be happy to give further background and detail to anyone genuinely interested.
love and friendship
** Mr F ** You can hardly blame the posters that have urged you to dump this ‘girlfriend’ of yours.
Three times you have come onto the board beefing about how she is an alcoholic, gives blow jobs to guys, and gets ‘shagged’ whilst being ‘drugged’ at some rugby players home.
She leaves you behind and swans off to have a good time with the girlies and invariably either gets fucked,drunk,or goes into the toilets and blows some guy.
For Gods sake man IF she is your g/f then these are things that she just does not do, if on the other hand that is her ‘thing’ then as the majority of posters say “get rid of the slapper and do it quick”
Personally I think it is all BS and you are getting some sort of perverse kick out of your threads
:smack: Of course. The surest way to avoid more melodrama is to have a relationship ending confrontation that coincides with the holidays. Or not have one, since I predict you are setting yourself up for a “I don’t want to ruin the holiday” excuse.
