My uncle the perv. Short and possibly incoherent.

The BBQ Pit
1

This man has known me since I was 4 years old. He’s always been a little creepy and weird, but goddamn this is over the freaking top. It’s bad enough that I’ve caught this dirty old man oogling my boobs. Now he’s tried to kiss me. Not the kind of puckered lip pecks I give my mom and grandpa, oh no. I’m talking about full-on open mouth, his hand on the back of my head kiss. ::BARF, PUKE, WRETCH, HURL, GAG, CONVULSE, DRY HEAVE:: I feel that I need to scrub my face and entire body with a fucking SOS pad.

And I’m not the first!!! He tried to corner my mother in her bedroom a few years ago at our family Christmas party. Mom just told me that he tried the same shit with my GRANDMOTHER!!!

I’m probably not making much sense right now. I’m seriously skeeved out at the moment, and had to write it out.

2

You need to make a big deal about this. Now. Right now.

You need to tell anyone that will listen. Start with the rest of the family. Make it very clear you’re willing to start talking to people outside the family, as well. Including the people with the hats and badges if need be.

Your family needs to confront him about this behavior, and make it emphatically clear that this shit won’t stand.

Above all, never allow yourself to be in the same room as he is alone. While you’re at it, that seems like sound advice for everyone else in your family, too.

3

ICK Factor NINE!!!

My unsolicited advice: the next time he even tries to do anything like this, yell and I mean YELL: “Please don’t touch me! Stop touching me! This is not appropriate!” etc. Loud enough for anyone in the house to hear. He should get the message.

I had an uncle who liked to “hug” my sister and I when we were teenagers. Luckily he wasn’t around for too long, and everyone picked up on it right away so family members were absolutely vigilant about keeping him away from us. shudder

4

Yes. Make a stink. He is relying on you being too embarrassed or shy or whatever to make a stink. So make a big deal of it.

5

Don’t just yell, knee him in the balls.

6

Preferably hard enough to lift him up off the ground.

You’re NOT overreacting, and you’re NOT “exaggerating to get attention”, you’re enforcing your right to your own person. Don’t let ANYONE tell you otherwise.

7

Are you saying that he tried it on with his own mother too? :eek:

Sheeeeesh. This guy has some serious problems. The quicker you get some intervention happening, the better for everybody, including him I’d say.

Call the Sexual Assault Hotline or whatever you guys have over there. Today.

8

I’m guessing he tried it with his sister-in-law’s mother, not his mother.

I could be wrong, but I hope not.

Knee him in the crotch as hard as you can the next time he tries something like this. Don’t let him be alone around any younger siblings or cousins.

9

I couldn’t make a stink about it. We were in my grandpa’s hospital room when this happened, plus I had that intense fight or flight reaction. Being the total weenie that I am, I didn’t even say anything. Right after, he went to the cafeteria and I called my mom. After he got back, I left. Of course, I was in my car before I had formulated what I should have said to him.

I told my husband and he said that if it happened again, he’d have a talk with Uncle Perv. But, Mom said she’d say something to him tonight.

I’m gonna tell my 13 & 14 year old nieces to never be alone with him.

Incidentally, he’s been way too friendly a couple times earlier this week. He never touched me, so I wasn’t sure if it was him or my skewed perception. I found out for sure today. YUCK

10

My mom and his wife are twin sisters (when Mom told me about her “encounter,” I immediately thought he must have some kind of kink involving twins). It was their mother that he tried to put the make on.

11

Not that it matters but how old are you and your uncle?

12

I’m curious about why nobody in the family has taken his behaviour seriously before.

This guy needs to be reported. Chances are it’s not only family members who are victims of his predatory activities.

13

I’m 29. He’s FUCKING 70. I realize that anyone, regardless of age or gender, can be predators. I just would never think of an older “gentleman” to be that way. I grew up around very protective, caring guys like my dad & grandpas.

14

That’s what my husband and I were just discussing… If he’s done this crap with people outside the family. Oh man, I bet his female workmates hated being in the same office with him. I can just see him trying this crap in the copy room.

We were also discussing whether or not his daughter (23) has had any bad things happen to her. Makes me ill just considering it.
As to why no one has done anything, my guess is that they don’t want to rock the boat. You can see how this attitude has allowed him to keep doing it.

15

“Please”? “Not appropriate”? You’re too polite. I’d go with “GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME RIGHT NOW!!” along with whatever physical punishment you can deliver.

16

Uggghhh! Seeker74, I feel so bad for you! Yuck! I think if I were you, I wouldn’t be content to just let mom “say something” to him. He needs to be reported for sexual assault or misconduct or whatever the law can slam him with! I was sexually abused when I was a child, and one of my life’s regrets is that no one ever reported the slime ball, because no one wanted to make that kind of a fuss. I realize this skews my perceptions a little, because I’d like to see all such predators hung by their balls. But I swear I think you should call the cops (if for no other reason than to make sure he stops doing this shit).

{{{Seeker74}}}

17

Actually, when my head was clear I came up with this one, in case he ever tries it again:

“Touch me again, you sick fuck, and you’ll be minus one beloved appendage.” Accompanied by an jab to the sternum and the Evil Eye.

18

I know something needs to be done about it. He’s got to be stopped one way or another. But the thing is (please bear with me) I really don’t want to cause a huge uproar. Is there any way to confront him/ get him to stop without the police? I think he needs councelling, because I’m sure this is a power thing with him… I seriously doubt that he feels amourous towards me, mom, or grandma.

thanks for the hug.

by the way, i had something bad happen to me when i was younger. i think that may have something to do with how i reacted.

19

You know, it all depends. Does he have a lot of money? I mean a LOT of money?

20

Seeker, he is the one who has caused the uproar, and he needs to be called on it.

You need to do this, not so much to protect yourself (because you have displayed here a resolve to never let this happen again to you) but to protect others from his lechery.

Fucking old cunt has gotten away with it for so long because people have been too scared to rock the boat.