Your response reminds me of my response when my father used to tell me to “Eat your _____, it will put hair on your chest.” (said jokingly, of course)
I would respond, “Yeah, but whose?”
I forgot to mention that I would prefer to have a man attached to it. He’s the best part.
Glad I don’t have one because I’m continually being surprised by the newness of experience and sensation my parts are capable of.
Wait a minute! Are you saying that your penis is prehensile and capable of hanging on to ladders, steering wheels and paintbrushes?
So … uh … how you doin’? 
[sub]Any man who uses the user name “Muffin” must be pretty secure in his manliness. Then again, if his penis is prehensile that could explain his confidence.[/sub]
Perhaps Muffin is a sea mammal.
Vaginas look like they should have teeth.
Some do.
I, for one, welcome our new vagina overlord, Anastasaeon.
Seems kind of oxymoronic, though.
Apropos of nothing, today I saw a low-budget comedy-horror movie about homosexual zombies during which one of the sashaying dead approached a rest-stop gigolo and presented his penis for some lovin’ only to have said member drop off due to rot.
Well, we can pee standing up
without getting our under wet
mostly
usually
well, not sopping wet
not that, being drunk, we’d care that much…
Ya know, I guess I shoulda thought of that.
But… picture yourself, dancing around in the small confines of a bathroom, wrestling with 250 pounds of sleep-walking man … uh… the monster trouser-snake already out …
if I had gotten him to sit on it, I’m afraid the Old-Faithful type ouspoof would have been too much. I can picture hiim levitating above the toilet seat, grabbing on to the window sill… as he sailed away into Piss Heaven … Kiptin! I donna think she will hold !!
:eek:
Thanks for the warning. I’d been thinking of switching to sleeping au naturel, but I guess I won’t, now.
I wish, FaerieBeth! Those dolphin males must be laughing at us for our lack of a prehensile penis.
Nah, Wile E, I’m just hoping to start an urban myth about men having prehensile penises. In truth, we don’t. But please keep that under your hat. (And my username is what my parents and their friends called me since I was a wee tot. Other members of my family have had life-long nick-names such as Shark, Speck and Cunny – and no, I have never had the courage to mention to my very religious and innocent cousins why their calling their daughter Cunny might not be the best idea. I guess by growing up in a family with a long tradition of silly names, being called Muffin was fine by me.)
Anastasaeon, usually just two or three Os at a time, and seldom more than four, so I take my hat off to you. (Whoops, that dang prehensile penis just jumped out from under my hat again.) It’s a bit of a challenge to ride the line between orgasm and ejaculation, for the key to not ejaculating is to relax, which is often difficult when every fibre of your being wants to consume your partner. The nicest two things about it is that the orgasms tend to build, so the the final one is roaringly amazing, and it can be timed to match with my partner’s.
brightpenny, I hear ya. The friends that I would most like to be with me tonight live one and two days away respestively. Curiosity, touch, exhilaration, passion, laughter, taste, smell, song, nervousness, joy, pain, relaxation, and most importantly, intimate connection. Thank goodness for friends with the right parts, whatever those parts may be. Sometimes not having someone to intimately snuggle up with is frustrating, but it makes the times together all the more fulfilling.
Number one reason for not having a vagina :-
Not sleeping in the wet patch.
I’ll just have to content myself with the fact that I’ll be making about $14,000 a year more than I would without a penis.
Yeah, but can you do the same thing standing up? And can you draw a heart and write I Love ____________ in the snow?
It’s a sign that I’ve had a really bad couple of weeks that this thread is making me irrationally furious. I’d take some deep breaths, but they seem to make me hyperventilate. So I will stop checking it.
Stupid sense of humor. It’s in Lake Charles, getting all moldy.
So Muffin, how you doin’?
This is my first time doin’ that…
Impressive bladder!
All I get is the _______________
Yes, but a vagina has much more earning potential.
If I had a vagina I’d be rich.
Doin’ fine. Life is good on the pale blue dot. Haven’t been caught in a zipper for a long time.