Public masturbation ruled legal in Sweden

Link.

Sounds like a pretty tortured interpretation of the law, but I guess that’s what lawyers live for.

Who would you say he was sexually assaulting?

I would guess that Sweden doesn’t have anything like a public indecency law, or at least, one that would apply to flipping your willy. Thus the “sexual assault” charge, which did not hold up.

Yeah - I don’t see it as tortured at all - they should have a law for that - not twist one to make it work for them.

You don’t charge people with grand theft for killing someone if that society doesn’t have a murder charge - and try and claim he was “taking the soul” of an individual. You get that society to make murder illegal.

I finally know where I truly belong.

He was clearly Violating the Ocean.
Some people get turned on by the weirdest things.

He was ready, and she was wet for him-it was kismet.

Himself. He was choking his chicken.

Even worse, he was committing self-abuse.

It was consentual S and M-That chicken wanted to be choked.

The lesson is, “Don’t mention anyone’s name while you’re jerking off in Sweden.”

Poseidon

The guardian of sea men? I don’t think so.

He was assaulting a primate. IOW, spanking his monkey.

“He was just trying to restrain that monkey, Your Honor, but it kept leaping up and down until [del]he[/del]it was exhausted.”

beating his bishop
flogging his dolphin
slap boxing the one-eyed champ

He abusing all kinds of people and things.

I am not a lawyer, but I would have assumed that public masturbation would fall under “förargelseväckande beteende.”*

Very, very surprised this isn’t the case, actually.

Public urination, for example, often falls under “förargelseväckande beteende”, and I’d wager that public masturbation tends to cause a heckuva lot more outrage than that.

  • The term literally means “outrage-causing behavior.”

I guess it’s not “outrage-causing behavior” if the crowd applauds at the end.

There’s a joke to be made here

“In Soviet Sweden, public masturbates you” doesn’t seem to be it.

Note To Self:
Do not, under any circumstances, do not shake hands with any Swedes whatsoever, from now on.