Here we go again… this time with The Big Bang Theory.
Leonard, please don’t take this the wrong way, but the day you win a Nobel Prize is the day I begin my research on the drag coefficient of tassels on flying carpets.
Do you realize what this MEANS?!! All I need is a healthy ovum, and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy!
I informed you thusly.
It’s very simple. Look – Scissors cuts Paper, Paper covers Rock. Rock crushes Lizard, Lizard poisons Spock. Spock smashes Scissors, Scissors decapitates Lizard. Lizard eats Paper, Paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, Rock crushes Scissors.
[knock] [knock] [knock]
panache?
[knock] [knock] [knock]
panache?
[knock] [knock] [knock]
panache?
Sheldon’s escaped and is terrorizing the village
Sheldon can I talk to you? Why me? Koothrappali has to drink to talk to me, Wolowitz is just creepy. Yes he is, Ok.
If either of us invent time travel, we agree that our first stop will be this meeting, five seconds from now.
[both look around]
Well, that was disappointing.
Bazinga!
I’m not crazy; my mother had me tested.
You better find my husband’s mother, 'cause one way or another we’re walking out of this airport with a dead woman.
That’s exactly what my father said. “Come to the games! Watch the games!” Week in and week out, from the time I was five until I went off to college. Longest seven years of my life.
“I’m sorry, we don’t have a code for robot’s hand grasping a man’s penis.”
What exactly does that expression mean, “friends with benefits”? Does he provide her with health insurance?
You may want to speak in a lower register.
Wow. I enjoyed that more than I thought I would.
Please pass the butter!
Stuart: Oh, Sheldon, I’m afraid you couldn’t be more wrong.
Sheldon: More wrong? Wrong is an absolute state and not subject to gradation.
Stuart: Of course it is. It’s a little wrong to say a tomato is a vegetable, it’s very wrong to say it’s a suspension bridge.
Sheldon: “The best number is 73. Why? 73 is the 21st prime number. Its mirror, 37, is the 12th and its mirror, 21, is the product of multiplying 7 and 3… and in binary 73 is a palindrome, 1001001, which backwards is 1001001.”
Leonard: “73 is the Chuck Norris of numbers!”
Sheldon: “Chuck Norris wishes… all Chuck Norris backwards gets you is Sirron Kcuhc!”’
You know, both selective mutism and an inability to separate from one’s mother can stem from a pathological fear of women. It might explain why the two of you have created an ersatz homosexual marriage to satisfy your need for intimacy.
Okay, now I just need to make sure I have a Lalita before I meet the grasshopper. It’s a sweet green miracle.