** The Next Big Science Fiction Movie Should Be…
Rheingold **
[Movie Announcer Voice] On a world…where Beer Ruled All…[/MAV]
(forgive me for fixing the spelling of “Rheingold”)
** I am an alcoholic
Let’s make up Biblical quotes **
Drinking that mess to their delight
When they gets drunk, start fighting all night
Knocking down windows and tearin’ out doors
Drinkin’ half a gallon and callin’ for more
- Isaiah 7:11
care for elderly mother
My experiment with Ritalin
Need $100,000 fast. Any suggestions?
Organ donation PSA
Fear of Puking - have your heard of such a thing?
Mrs. L.A. is sick
**Explain: Monty Python’s Church Police?
Attention white people: ITS… **
** Well…here goes… [Pride in How One Dresses]
Brits, if underpants are “pants”, what are pants**
I’ll 'ave you know these are me on-the-town undies, sport.
** What happens if a cop lies in traffic court?
What is the “21 foot rule?”**
If his nose grows more than 21 feet on the witness stand, it’s a sign the officer may be embellishing his testimony.
Mrs. L.A. is sick
Depression or something else?
** Words that sound dirty but actually aren’t
Let the schadenfreude begin**
(edited slightly. and, I hope, forgivably)
Political Jokes
Jeb Bush campaign for POTUS thread
Yeah, his whole campaign is becoming is becoming one. Especially if he does poorly in New Hampshire.
**Teleportation physics question
visit to San Jose CA; day trip or 2 day trip **
Dang, if it takes longer than just getting in the car and driving there, what’s the point?
**Euphemisms for lesbian sex? (don’t need answer fast))
Dog on Merry-go-Round **
Nah, that just sounds more like a dysphemism.
** What to name my new dog
Slow death or quick one? **
I dunno – how fast can your dog run?
** I am an alcoholic
If you could shove your head up your ass how far could you go **
Here… hold my beer.
** You Know You’re Getting Old When…
Appliance longevity **
Old Maytag Repairmen don’t Die – they get stickers placed on them, get taken out to the curb, and get recycled.
** Euphemisms for lesbian sex? (don’t need answer fast))
Lemons to lemonade: my unheated living room is now a huge walk-in cooler**
Uh…never mind.
**What are all you people texting about all the time ?!
Divorce and splitting up a home **
ok u can hav the house but I am keepng both kids
**Words that sound dirty but actually aren’t
Sacre bleu! Le circonflex va disparaitre! **
What are all you people texting about all the time ?!
Is Norway’s government better than U.S.?
I’m calling bullshit. You’re all really just sharing kitty videos, aren’t you?