I would want to know because it would bother me to corrupt an innocent. I would marry a virgin though and not be bothered by it.
I’m a male and I voted* I’m a male and think you should tell the woman you’re dating*. In reality I think you should tell the first few women you date. Give her a memorable experience.
When I was young (and looked younger) and in the Navy, almost every time! 
For some reason, mid-30s women in a Navy town just LOVE to think they’re your first… (or at least they did back in the late 80s).
Not sure if you’re being serious, but this is the kind of attitude is based on old-fashioned myths. That just because someone hasn’t put a thing in the thing, they’re clean, pure, innocent etc, and as soon as they do it, they’re corrupted. It’s BS.
If an adult hasn’t even masturbated I will admit that sex may come as something of a shock, but still they are not going to go through some jekyll and hyde transformation. They were an ordinary, flawed human before, and they will be afterwards too.
For the rest (that have masturbated at least), it’s really not such a big deal doing it with another person.
As I said upthread, IMO the big deal is being in the first serious relationship.
This is a perfect example of why you *don’t * tell.
This is insane.
Bean fight! Bean fight! 
I was talking about telling a woman with I will hopefully have a relationship with. I imagine the scenario is we’ve been on a few dates and sex is imminent. Do I tell her or just go with the flow?
No way - it’s a perfect example of why you do tell. Because then you get to not have sex with somebody who thinks sex is dirty and wrong.
n/m
Here’s the thing, dating is a process of elimination. Do you really want your first time to be with a woman who would dump you for being a virgin, or see your status as “baggage” to be avoided?
When you are at an intimate point with a kind, decent woman, then tell her. She will probably take it a little more seriously than she would otherwise, and may even take some effort to make it special for you.
Look carefully at your poll responses. The answer from the female perspective is clear.
<Foghorn Leghorn>
You’re… I say… You’re built too low, son! I keep chuckin’ em and you keep duckin’ em!
Keep your pie hole shut about it and go with the flow, son*!
*sigh… nice kid but he’s as sharp as a bag of wet mice.
</Foghorn Leghorn>
That’s a nice kind of message for a movie, but in the real world there’s a “need to know” on lots of things. If we operate on the basis of telling people things we think might cause them to dump us (so we can eliminate them as bad people), we’d better prepare for many lonely years and not gaining much experience.
I think a lot of that is the phrasing of the OP. “Secret” is a dirty word, to women in particular IME.
If we put it instead as “No need to bring it up, but if you’re nervous about sex or the topic comes up naturally, be open about it”, I’m sure that would be a very popular poll option.
Surely, it depends on why you’re a virgin. If you’re a virgin because you have strong views about the proper place of sex in a relationship, and are waiting for just the right circumstances because you want to make it special, then you’re probably looking for a woman who holds similar views, and so you should talk about it. If you’ve been trying to get into the pants of every woman you meet, and have consistently struck out for your entire life, then that’s probably not something you want to advertise, and so you probably shouldn’t talk about it unless asked. If your parents sent you to a strict single-sex boarding school and you just never had the opportunity, eh, you might as well tell: You might get a pity-screw out of it, if nothing else.
I guess they’re not two peas in a pod. 
Bring it up at the appropriate time (when it’s apparent it’ll happen / when clothes start a-flyin’) & not on the first date.
Spice Weasel was the first to say it, past experience does not necessarily translate well to the current partner as this one may dis/like _X , or like it a slightly different way.
Wait a minute. Does it still count as being a virgin, after all the homosexual experimentation that automatically and instantly results when you’re sent to a strict single-sex boarding school?
Are are the movies that I’ve been watching getting that part all wrong?
I have no idea why you all seem to think I dumped that guy for being a virgin. I didn’t. I dumped him FOR NOT TELLING ME he was a virgin.
The next guy I dated was a virgin too and it was no problem. (this was in college, btw) I’m glad I knew because he experienced a bit of “performance anxiety” at first, but that was easy enough to get past because the reason for it was clear and we could talk about it. We dated for about 6 months
All this “Don’t tell her because if she known you’re a virgin she might not fuck you” is odious. If she wouldn’t fuck you if she knew, then you’re taking advantage of her ignorance. That’s not ethical or honorable.
This, exactly. I certainly would have approached things differently with the first guy if I had known.
Well, that was a graceful way of getting around the “you’re not allowed to call another poster a liar” rule.
Of course there was a little more to the conversation than me just saying “get out,” but I’m sure you realized that. I explained exactly why I didn’t want to see him again as well. Other than that, what doesn’t ring true to you?
Perhaps it’s relevant that this wasn’t really an ongoing romantic relationship, but rather an evening between friends that turned unexpectedly “interesting.” I think he wanted more than friendship/casual, and was definitely very angry with himself for not having told me.
No, sweetie-bean. The OP is a virgin because he’s neurotic, not the other way around.
Like TruCelt said above, the female perspective is clear in the poll. There’s nothing to be confused about. Women would rather know.
Well, if you had dumped him for lying about it, that would have been one thing. But for just not mentioning it? I think that’s just about the strangest thing any of us have ever heard.
Well, I’m sure that a lot of people wouldn’t have fucked me if they knew any number of things about me. But I’m sure as hell not volunteering a list of all my personality flaws, or shit I’ve done in the past that I’d rather they don’t know about, on the off chance that I’ll find one who’ll see past all that. Is that “taking advantage of their ignorance”, too?
No, I fully believe you are telling the truth. When I say I don’t understand, I mean I don’t understand why you found this so upsetting. I guess I expected you to clarify that he had lied about it, and that you were angry that he had lied, or that he admitted to deliberately deceiving you, because I don’t understand why not telling you about his lack of experience would be a deal-breaker. There is a difference, to me, between deliberately deceiving someone and just not bringing something up. The former is odious and the latter is against my preferences but entirely forgivable. While I would prefer to know, I don’t think a guy is mandated to tell me his sexual history prior to sleeping with me, nor would I feel betrayed or angry if he decided not to tell me until afterward. My reaction would likely be, ‘‘Aww, you could have told me,’’ and, ‘‘Oh, well let’s be sure to give you plenty of practice.’’